


me & joshua matthews

by teatart



Category: Girl Meets World
Genre: Cross-Posted on FanFiction.Net, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-25
Updated: 2019-08-25
Packaged: 2020-09-26 15:18:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 35,915
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20391832
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/teatart/pseuds/teatart
Summary: What was worse? Seeing a guy that you embarrassingly fawned over for so long or being partnered up with your ex best friend? Unfortunately, Maya Hart was stuck with both.





	1. you're paired up with a waiting lady?

**Author's Note:**

> this is an old story of mine from ff.net but since its been getting some attention there i figured readers/joshaya shippers on ao3 may want to read it too. enjoy! x

Everything seemed normal.

The sun shined brightly through Maya's sheer curtain and into her sleepy blue eyes. A horrible thought appeared in her head as she twisted her small body to go back to sleep.

School.

High school to be more specific which seemed like the calamity of the teen race. But just as she did every week for five days, Maya got up and made her way to the kitchen where her step-dad, Shawn Hunter waited with breakfast.

Shawn differentiated himself from Maya's biological father in many ways. The obvious one being that Shawn cared about her like she was his own while her father couldn't care less. But one that always made her smile every morning was the fact that Shawn never cooked. He tried once and it was a disaster, tons of smoke and white foam from the fire extinguisher.

On the table was a brown paper bag that Maya knew had her usual breakfast sandwich from a store around the corner. There was also a small paper coffee cup which she was more than happy to see.

"If your mom asks, it's decaf." Said Shawn once Maya sat down and grabbed the coffee.

The girl rolled her eyes, "She won't. She never does."

It came as a shock that Maya's mom had the chance to meet and fall in love with Shawn. Because she never seemed to have time for her daughter though Maya tried not to take it personally, her mom has been lonely for quite some time and Shawn was an amazing person to have in your life.

But it still stung when Shawn would pretend that Maya had a regular mom. She knew she only had half a mother and learned to live with it.

"Maya—" Shawn started but she cut him off, not wanting to listen to his long speech about her mom loving her.

"I gotta get dressed or I'll be late." And they both knew the conversation was over.

[*]

Farkle pulled up to her the front of her apartment in his beat up dark green 2000 Honda. The brisk March air blew at her jean clad legs before she got in the car to meet Farkle and his bright turtleneck.

"You know it's not that cold outside, I don't understand why you have to wear that everyday." Said Maya as Farkle pulled away from her block and began driving.

"I'm a fashion icon at John Quincy Adams High and I need to uphold my reputation. If anyone else is wearing a turtleneck, they're pulling a Farkle."

She rolled her eyes but an amused smile played on her lips. Farkle definitely wasn't your average guy. And he's been this bold since they were in diapers. Maya could remember, Farkle was the one that stood out from the three of them.

Maya, Farkle and Riley...

The two of them had a good ten minutes to go to their shared locker before class started and it just so happened that they had their locker right in front of miss tall and beautiful herself.

There at her locker was Riley Matthews, their ex best friend.

She was slathering pink lip gloss on her lips while glancing in her compact mirror. The sight made Maya nauseous. Things changed completely since freshman year...

And like clockwork, Missy showed up with two other look a likes by her side and a pained looking Lucas Friar behind her.

That poor boy became her personal toy the moment he stepped into the school building. Maya almost felt bad for him if it wasn't for the fact that she knew how much of a coward he was. That was the only reason she "didn't care" when Missy glared at Riley like an insect before plastering a dazzling smile on her face.

"I feel so honored seeing royalty altogether." Farkle whispered and Maya chuckled faintly.

[*]

Everything seemed normal.

Her classes were tolerable until she went to her eighth period.

English was dull and boring as usual with the exception of the texts Maya would get from Farkle. Then something odd happened.

"That's it! Everyone get off your phone!" She screamed. And it was unusual because Ms. Kelly never yelled or got angry. She was so calm that some people accused her of being a pothead. But that also had something to do with her long frizzy mousy brown hair.

All eyes were on her instantly. Even the royals gave her their undivided attention.

"Children of this generation truly are a disappointment. You all are looking down at your phones in your laps! Talk, learn, live a little bit!" Her small figure practically begged the class. Then her eyes lit up in a way that Maya's never seen before.

It almost worried her.

"I'll be giving all of you an assignment and you'll be working in pairs." Maya could hear chairs being pushed back and voices of people claiming their partner.

"But I will be deciding them." said Ms. Kelly and everyone stopped. She smiled when they did before returning to the middle of the classroom again.

Everyone returned to their seat grumbling about how unfair the class was. But Ms. Kelly didn't seem to care in the slightest. Quickly she read off names as people went to their partners,

"Brandon and Sarah."

"Darby and Isadora."

Maybe if Maya's life was full of surprises, she would've expected to be put with someone she didn't like.

Missy Bradford, for example.

But Ms. Kelly did her one better.

"Maya and Riley." Ms. Kelly called out and Maya's stomach dropped. She dared herself to look over at Riley who didn't seem to like the arrangement either. That, or she saw who Missy's partner was.

The cowboy.

Reluctantly, Maya grabbed her stuff and moved to Riley's desk three seats in front of her. She could already hear Farkle's teasing. Of course, she would be partnered up with Riley.

Avoiding her eyes was Maya's main goal in the class.

"You'll be answering twenty questions about the other and I expect this back in two weeks. Spend time together, speak to people who aren't in your clique, learn new things about people you won't see after you graduate in June."

Her inspirational speech was ended dramatically by the bell ringing and Maya was grateful. After she left the classroom, it was like the air came back to her lungs. She had to answer questions about Riley, a girl she hardly knew anymore.

[*]

"You get to work with one of the queen's waiting ladies? What an honor." Said Farkle on the way back to Maya's apartment.

Maya didn't feel like smacking Farkle, she was too busy thinking about how awkward the next two weeks would be for her. Would they bring up freshman year? Would they talk about what happened?

Would they go back to how it was before?

Farkle's stop at her house pulled her out of her reverie. And she pushed Riley Matthews to the back of her mind like she usually did.

The pair walked into Shawn talking to someone in a hushed serious tone on the phone. Farkle waved hello while Maya shot him a concerned look which he didn't seem to notice.

She almost brought up the topic to Farkle but he had already gone on his rant about Isadora Smackle and how obsessed she was with him.

The girl really couldn't get enough. She would send him flowers and "secret" admirer notes, the worst part is that she's probably done that since they were kids. Telling Farkle that he was so handsome and that he looked extra dashing was part of Isadora's daily vocabulary.

When Farkle left, she felt drained. The day at school had done in her in though. Her old friend kept popping up when Maya tried to sleep.

Defeated, she got up to drink something but stopped before turning to go into the kitchen. Shawn was talking to someone at the door in the same tone of voice as before and Maya peeked to see who.

For the second time that day, Maya was shocked, standing in her living room was the boy she remembered fawning over for so long when she was in middle school.

Joshua Matthews.


	2. love you too

She was nervous.

Her palms were sweating and she was wiping them furiously on her plaid pajama pants while mentally cursing Joshua Matthews for making her so nervous. Carefully, she tiptoed back to her room, going through possible reasons as to why Joshua Matthews (who grew more handsome to her dismay) would be in their apartment with two suitcases.

Was he moving in?

Was Shawn pranking her again? Last time, she remembered that he had placed a fake snake under her bed for April Fool's Day and her mother had slapped him. But this didn't even compare to snakes (her biggest fear) because though snakes were terrifying, Joshua gave her a different kind of fright.

Because she hadn't doodled her first name with the last name of a snake over and over again in her notebooks. She hadn't planned out which day would be best to be married or how he would ask. Thinking about it, she cringed under her blankets, she was so immature.

There was a bigger and better question that was on her mind though, why was Joshua here and not at his brother's house?

[*]

In the morning, she woke up to laughter.

It was strange because it was normally quiet with Shawn occasionally putting on 90's alternative music. But this was just weird, she stretched her arms and rubbed her gummy eyes before walking into a scene in the kitchen that looked the opposite of Shawn's mood yesterday. There was a stack of fresh pancakes in the middle of their dark wooden circle table and three plates laid out.

Josh and Shawn's had syrup residue and bits of pancake on it, while the other one had two pancakes that were untouched.

Their laughter stopped so they could look at her, Maya refused to make eye contact with Josh, "There's my favorite girl! Good morning! Josh made us pancakes." Shawn cheered and it worried her. He only called her his favorite girl when something was up. Being gutsy, she sneaked a peek at Josh who still had pancakes in his mouth and looked like the cutest version of a human chipmunk she's ever seen.

Gosh, she was pathetic.

"Good morning, Maya!" His muffled voice said as he tried to smile.

"'Morning." She muttered before taking a seat by Shawn and eating her pancakes while the other two discussed small topics like sports. It was unusually casual and Maya felt slightly annoyed being out of the loop.

Her thoughts of paranoia were proven right when she was out the door to go meet Farkle and she heard their voices die down. She heard their voices again as she put her ear to the door but they were speaking so softly that the topic of conversation was hard to understand.

Groaning under her breath, she stomped outside to where her friend was waiting.

"I'm telling you, Farkle. Something is up. Shawn never keeps secrets from me, we practically tell each other everything. It definitely involves Josh but I just don't understand why he would bring him here and then not explain why."

"Maybe he wanted to help you rekindle your middle school romance." Farkle made kissing noises and it took all the self control she had to not slap him while he was looking for a place to park.

He spotted one and it seemed that so did the royals. They swiftly parked the black Range Rover that Missy had bragged so much about getting last year, in the place Farkle was beginning to pull into. Farkle hit the brakes and Maya flew forward hitting her forehead on the dashboard. Holding her throbbing head, she glared at the smirking face of Missy Bradford.

"Oops. I guess you'll have to be faster next time." Her complete court was there. Sarah, Darby, Riley and Lucas. Though Darby and Sarah were smirking along with their ring leader, the other two seemed uncomfortable being there.

Not being able to think of something on the spot, Maya flipped her off. Though Maya didn't see it, Riley's lips curved up into a small smile that left as soon as it came.

Maya felt her blood boil as she and Farkle spent the next twenty minutes looking for a place to park. She hated all of them. Every single member that was considered, "royalty".

[*]

Ms. Kelly hadn't forgotten about the assignment she gave the day before. Though everyone in class was hoping and praying that she did. The only person that was actually happy about who they were paired with was Missy and it was because she loved to throw herself at Lucas and now she could spend the next three weeks in class doing just that.

There was a list of questions that the pairs were meant to answer were given out by Ms. Kelly who seemed to be enjoying the fact that everyone else was miserable.

First question made Maya roll her eyes.

**What's your full name?**

Were they for real? She didn't need to exactly speak to Riley, she could just fill this out herself. _Riley_ _Elliot_ _Matthews_, Maya wrote down. The next question was when was your birthday then asked what her favorite color was.

_December_ _8th_

She was just beginning to write down purple when Riley's dainty hand came over her pale one.

"I guess this isn't going to be as easy as we thought." She said with a smile. Maya looked over at her paper and realized that she had filled out everything as well. Maybe, Riley actually appreciated their friendship and didn't discard the memories like she had originally thought. She could say with pride that their friendship was ten times better than the one she currently has with Missy.

"Why? You don't like purple anymore?" It came out more bitter than Maya would've liked but she didn't like thinking about how much she didn't know about Riley now. Missy probably knew more at this point.

Riley let out a breathy laugh, "No. I actually really like the color green."

Unlike her partner, Maya stuck with her color that she chose when she was a child, yellow.

A sigh escaped as she realized that they would actually have to talk to each other to complete the assignment, "Okay, is your favorite movie still _Titanic_?"

"No," She replied sheepishly, "It's _Tangled_. Has yours changed to anything?"

She wanted to say no. She wanted Riley to know that she's the only one that's changed. High school put their friendship to the test and they _– _no Riley failed. But sadly, Shawn had made her watch old 80's movies and it her favorite movie went from, _Twilight _to _The Goonies._

Riley grinned when Maya mentioned Shawn in her explanation of her change in movies and Maya almost brought up how Josh was in her apartment but she decided against it. She didn't need to know. They weren't friends and it wasn't any of Maya's business to be spreading around anyway.

"How's your mom?" asked Riley. The next question was something that Maya didn't really feel comfortable talking about (**what is your family like?**). Especially with Riley who practically saw the main component to her family every other weekend.

"You know. She's busy with work and stuff. How are your parents?" She quickly switched the subject, her mom wasn't something that she talked about often nor did she want to.

"Still happily in love. It's almost sickening. I caught them making out in the kitchen and almost threw up." The two laughed while jotting down on their papers what the other one answered.

"You're parents are sweet. I think it's funny how they still act like teenagers."

Riley rolled her eyes, "You only think it's funny and sweet because you haven't witnessed it. I'm sure you don't think Shawn is all that charming and sweet with your mom." Maya pretended to gag.

"Absolutely not. That's just painful to watch."

The brunette chuckled, "Exactly!"

Talking and joking with Riley again was strange. She thought that she would be angry if the two ever had a conversation again. She'd scream and yell about how selfish and conceded her ex friend was. She'd shout about how shallow and influenced she had become. It seemed that her mouth didn't want to argue. It wanted to talk to Riley and laugh with her like no time has passed at all.

And it seemed that that day, the subject about the messy ending to their friendship wouldn't be brought up. It'd wait for another day when the two would be comfortable talking about it. Maya was uncomfortable just thinking about it.

She disposed of the thought as they moved onto the next question, **what are your hobbies?**

[*]

"So, you're saying that you and Riley Matthews actually talked? Did you bring up freshman ye-"

"No. And I kind of didn't want to. It was nice just talking to her again."

Farkle groaned as he made a left turn, "Don't tell me that you're going to be sucked back into that. I hope you still remember what happened."

"You know that you were just as _sucked in_ as I was. If not even more, you were practically in love with her." Maya argued. She was beginning to regret telling Farkle any of it.

"And you were practically her sister but look how that turned out." The moment Maya spotted her home, she'd never been more grateful. The car halted and she jumped out, not even bothering to say goodbye. "Maya. Maya, wait!" He called but she didn't listen. She just kept going until she was inside and away from Farkle's harsh words.

When Maya walked inside her apartment, Josh and Shawn were still whispering but they moved to the couch. To her dismay, Josh lifted his head with a chipper grin on his face to wave at her. She doesn't even want to think about the embarrassing way she must've waved back, instead she focused her attention on getting into her room so she could do her algebra homework.

Her phone was buzzing with what she guessed were texts from Farkle. She was about to text him that she wasn't as upset as she seemed, she just didn't need to be reminded of freshman year. He was reminding her of how humiliated she felt which was something she completely forgot about while talking to Riley.

After she finished with her last math problem, she decided to take a look at the long list of texts from her eccentric friend.

_you know i really am sorry. i didn't mean to make you mad, _was the last thing he text her.

**i know. just know that when you get a bunch of messages from Isadora, you're good ol' friend was the one who gave her your number.**

_-_- the sacrifices i have to make for this friendship..._

Maya laughed, **love you too**


	3. are you playing hooky?

The next day, the sun once again didn't wake her.

It was large hands and they were shaking her small body. Her eyes popped open to glare at the genius who decided it would be funny to wake her up and she nearly jumped out of her skin when she saw it was Josh.

As if she slept naked, she pulled the blankets over her chest, absolutely horrified, "Don't you know the meaning of privacy?!"

He chuckled, not looking embarassed at all about what he did. Maya thought about how bad her breath must smell and why he hasn't run for the hills because of the golden bird's nest that was her hair. "Shawn wanted me to wake you up because he needed to tell you something."

"And this couldn't have waited until later? The sun is rising now!"

Josh just shrugged, "You should just go and find out." He made his way to the door but not before winking at her and saying, "Nice hair." He was completely gone by the time that Maya was able to find something to throw at him.

Grunting, she slid off her bed and headed to the kitchen where Shawn waited with nothing. No coffee, no sandwich. She lifted her brow, questioning if this was some sort of test.

"Was the thing you needed to tell me about breakfast or lack thereof?"

Shawn gave a boyish grin and shook his head, "I have decided that you are missing school today." Then he took a sip out of his own paper cup of coffee and continued to look at her.

"No." She replied simply.

Flabbergasted, he almost choked on his coffee, "What do you mean no? I thought you would be happy about it. You hate school."

Yeah, she thought, but that was before she started talking to Riley again. But she wasn't going to tell Shawn that, "I never said that." Instead of continuing with their little banter, Shawn put his cup down and got up.

"You know I wasn't really giving you an option, kiddo."

Maya rolled his eyes at him. He was completely abusing his power as an adult (and her stepdad) to make her do whatever he said, "If you want me to stay home to watch and Air Buds with you, then you're being ridiculous. Besides, Josh isn't in school so he'll be more than happy to-"

"I'm not making you stay home to watch Air Buds. Josh has been here for only a day and I think he needs to have some fun. Besides, I remember you two being close when you were younger."

Her cheeks were practically on fire. Close? If stalking the other meant close then they were thick as thieves. "We were never close." She hissed. It was around that time that Josh aka the bane of her existence strolled into the kitchen.

"I'll try not to take that personally, Hart." The Cheshire cat grin on his face was making her uneasy as well. Hell, everything about him made her uneasy.

She opened her mouth to sass him but thought it would just be a waste of time, "I'm going to school!"

"C'mon, kiddo. Get dressed. Time is of the essence."

Realizing that she was getting absolutely nowhere in the conversation, Maya decided to get dressed.

* * *

It turns out Shawn's defintion of fun for Josh is going to Six Flags. It seemed odd at the time because she didn't remember either of them liking roller coasters, yet there they were, in the line to get on _El_ _Torro_.

Her phone was vibrating like crazy with texts from Farkle. She'd told him to not pick her up and a whole bunch of questions had stemmed from there.

**why? aren't you coming to school?**

**are you playing hooky? i didn't know you had it in you**

**this kind of reminds me of middle school and it's not just because your skipping school if you know what i mean ;)**

Maya stopped looking at her texts after that because she felt like punching him. Besides, if Josh were to see anything that brought up her horrible crush on him...well the thought itself made her want to die of embarrassment. She already had been dodging talking to him the whole time. Shawn found it more than easy to carry on a conversation and he hadn't shut up until right they began to become closer to the actual roller coaster seats. Maya was thankful that she got to so lucky as to not have to talk to him.

But Shawn wasn't talking and her luck ran out.

"So, you're a sophomore now?" Josh asked looking her up and down. She glared at him. The cheeky grin on his face let her know that he was joking but she still was upset over his poking fun at her height.

"You're hilarious. I'm a senior, actually."

He chuckled, "You used to think I was funny." Why does she have the feeling that him bringing up the past wasn't going to work in her favor?

"I used to think you were a lot of things." She crossed her arms and instantly regretted the words that came out of her mouth. Though Josh seemed to enjoy it completely, she was surprised his cheeks haven't become sore from smiling so much.

"Like what?" He tilted his head to the side and she turned her head, annoyed by how easy it was for him to look good.

"Like nothing. I thought you were repulsive." Her blue eyes tried focusing on anything but the boy in front of her and they ended up on Shawn who seemed really fidgety and it made Maya laugh. "Is someone a little scared to get on the ride?"

Shawn scowled while balling his hands into fists to stop them from shaking, "Of course not! I'm a grown man, do you actually think I'm afraid of roller coasters?" The three were only ten people away from being put into seperate aisles to get on the ride and Shawn's eyes kept drifting towards the exit.

"No," Maya considered, "I've never actually been to an amusement park with you."

"Well, then I'll have you know that I'm not scared. At all."

Josh took notice of how scared he was too, "Really? I think what I'm excited for is the huge drop right at the beginning. But they almost tease you by bringing you around so you could see what's next."

"Huge?" He choked out and Maya had to bite her lip to keep from bursting out laughing.

"Massive, I'm surprised you even want to go. I know you have a thing with heights." She added in. His face was visibly getting paler and normally she would be worried but he forced her out of school on the one day that she actually wanted to go, so watching Shawn squirm was perfectly okay with her.

"I'll be fine." He squeaked.

"So, you won't mind if I ask the nice lady if we could go in the front?" asked Josh, mischief glinting in his dark eyes. That seemed to do it because Shawn pushed past a young couple and some pouty little kid to get to the exit. No one stopped him but the moment he was out, Maya and Josh looked at each other and burst out laughing. They were moved to their designated aisles by an annoyed middle aged woman and that was when the two realized it was just them now.

"I guess we can go to the front now."

She shook her head furiously, "No way. Absolutely not."

"C'mon! Don't tell me you're scared too."

Of course she was! But on a scale of 1 to Shawn, she was about a 5 when it came to roller coasters. They weren't so bad after you got on them and they weren't that bad when you were in the back. People in the back could hear what's coming and know what to expect and Maya was fine with that. But the way that he phrased it, he made it sound like he was challenging her.

And Maya Hart never backed out of a challenge.

"Fine. Next coaster, I'll get in the front."

Why, oh why did Maya Hart never back out of a challenge?

[*]

El Torro was probably the worst coaster ever. She kept her eyes closed and head down the whole time while Josh was screaming his head off in excitement. The boy really wasn't afraid of anything, when the two got to look at the picture they took, Maya's blonde hair was blocking her face while Josh looked like Christmas had come early for him.

"If you buy that, I swear…" Maya grumbled but Shawn bought it anyway. The three made their way to the next ride, the ride that Josh had chosen: Kingda Ka. One look at the tall green coaster made her shudder. And one look at the tall Matthews boy told her that he planned the whole thing.

Shawn smiled and waved at the pair while they walked to get in line. The whole way in, Maya thought of ways she could get out of their deal with her dignity still intact. But the smug look on Josh's face told her otherwise, if she turned back now, he'd never let her live it down. So, she thought of something from the top of her head and tried to distract herself, "So, why are you here?" She asked bluntly.

The expression on his face disappeared almost instantly, "What do you mean?"

She felt a twinge of guilt at the look on his face. Maybe it was something personal and he didn't want to talk about it, she should probably drop it, "I mean, why do you have packed suitcases in my apartment. It's not like you're paying rent." Her mouth really needed to cooperate with her brain. Why was she still talking about it?

"Um, no reason. I just wanted to come see you-guys, I wanted to see you guys. College isn't everything they make it out to be."

"No outrageous parties? Girls throwing themselves at you?"

His lips quirked upwards into a small smile as his eyes rested on the small girl beside him, "Well, that wasn't so bad."

Maya rolled her eyes, "Pig."

He laughed, "Well, what about you? Break any hearts, yet?"

Surely, he was joking. There was no boy in her school that was interesting enough. And evidently, the boys at her school felt the same way about her. All of them were the same. Shallow, idiotic and hormonal. Any girl with boobs could probably get any guy at John Quincy Adams High.

_Cough_ Missy Bradford _Cough._

"Yeah sure. And I'm also running for office."

"I'm being serious!" Josh looked compleletly confused too. They continued to make their way to the coaster and Maya was shocked to see that they were close. She was surprised that she was so eager to get on but at the moment, anything would be better than discussing her love life with Joshua Matthews.

"So am I. You can't be serious. I don't look like a Victoria Secret Angel aka what all the boys in my school set their standards to."

His eyebrows furrowed and he seemed to be deep in thought, Maya looked longingly at the lime green seats that would lead her away from this conversation. "I don't get it. They want you to look like some 30 year old model that has a bunch of makeup on? You don't need that. You're so much better than that."

Maya scoffed, "Yeah okay."

He looked at her like she just asked him to say the alphabet, "You are! For starters, you're fun, you're loyal-"

"And I don't go in the garbage?"

He glared at her but continued, "You're very outspoken, clever, brave," Maya opened her mouth to contradict him again but his next words left her speechless, "And let's not forget how incredibly beautiful you are."

A real smile graced his face when he saw her expression, the lady that made sure everyone was safe inside the ride guided them in and Maya was taking a seat in the front before she could even realize what happened. The same woman with her tight ponytail was pressing down on everyone's handles before making sure they were secure. Everything was still and just when Maya felt like maybe her mouth could make coherent words, they were launched from their spot.

Her heart was racing even more than before and she desperately searched for something to keep her from falling out. That thing just so happened to be Josh's arm which was firm, to Maya's delight.

Her eyes were shut tight the entire time which she found didn't work on this particular ride because she could feel the drop and it didn't feel pleasant. But Josh felt pleasant and she was embarassingly still holding onto him even when the ride had stopped.

"Maya," Josh chuckled softly, "The ride is done. We have to get off."

She peaked through one eye and flushed at the amused looks on everyone's faces, "Oh my gosh!" She said, throwing her hands over her scarlet face. Josh grabbed one of her hands and dragged her out of the seats until she could feel the sun hitting her skin.

"I'm guessing Maya enjoyed herself." said Shawn. She was still shaking and Josh was still holding her hand (which she didn't mind). She mustered enough strength to send her stepdad the stank eye but it didn't seem to do anything.

It actually just made him laugh. Another thing was still on her mind, why hadn't Josh let go of her hand? "I think I have nail marks in my arm now." said Josh and Maya felt her cheeks get hot.

Shawn laughed again, "I think I'll get the pictures for this one too." And he strolled off to pick up the pictures, leaving her with a beaming Joshua. He lowered his head to look at her as she still had a firm grip on his hand.

"You know you were practically in my lap and the only thing that was keeping you in your seat was the bar in front of us."

She groaned before letting her head drop, "I know, I-"

His other hand was suddenly under her chin and lifting her face to look at him, "We should get on roller coasters more often." He was going to give her a heart attack.

Joshua Matthews was going to be the end of her.

* * *

"Incredibly beautiful."

He was talking about her, Maya Hart. He thought her, Maya Hart was beautiful. And it was her, Maya Hart that was smiling like an idiot when she was laying in bed. She shouldn't be smiling though. It was just a compliment and sure she only received them from Shawn and her mother but it was nice to hear it from someone who wasn't a family member.

Also, it was nice to hear from someone who was completely out of her league.

Who was she kidding it was nice to hear from Josh. Because Josh was incredibly beautiful.

Now, all she had to do was stop smiling like a creeper and go to sleep. Don't think about Josh. Don't think about how he was so close to you the whole day and most definitely do _not_ think of his sweet smelling cologne...

The sound of a door clicking shut pulled her from her daydreams. Was someone awake? She ignored the part of her brain that hoped it was Josh. Stealthily, she snuck her way over to the door and peaked through to see a tall figure moving towards the door.

Was it an intruder? Nah, that'd be stupid they were making noise and they didn't seem like they were carrying anything. The moonlight shined through the window and onto the face of Joshua Matthews who opened the door and looked around the room before closing it behind him.

Where was he going?


	4. liar! liar! liar!

Maya woke up on her own the next day.

Her mind had kept her up all night thinking of reasons why Josh would sneak out in the middle of the night. Surely it wasn't to do anything illegal. This was Josh after all and sure he liked to be mischievous at times but most of the times he had a conscience.

Shawn waited in the kitchen for her with an unusually happy grin. He sipped his coffee liked he'd sprinkled it with rainbows and sunshine, enjoying every bit of it. But he was alone and some part of her worried about what Josh could be doing.

"Good morning, kiddo." He shoved the folded brown paper bag to her and she took it while her eyes still wandered around the room to see if he left any evidence.

"'Morning. Where's Josh?" Maya tried saying casually. Shawn didn't think there was anything weird about how she asked, he might've just thought it was weird that she cared.

"He's sleeping. Said Six Flags really tired him out." **Liar! Liar! Liar!** Maya screamed mentally. What if he really did do something illegal? Was there a stash of money under his mattress from the local liquor store?

"Oh, okay." She replied awkwardly before taking a bite of her sandwich. Maybe Josh didn't do anything stupid. Any nineteen year old could just want to sneak out in the night to...explore. That's it, he probably just wanted to explore, Maya kept repeating in her head.

* * *

"So, how was Six Flags?" Farkle said, wiggling his eyebrows. She rolled her eyes before leaning over and flicking his forehead.

"Stop being gross. Nothing happened. We went on rides and that's it," He gave her a look and she grinned, "And it would've been fun if I had my best friend with me."

He sat back in his chair, clearly content with that answer, "That's it, huh? It was so boring? Nothing happened with your husband?"

Her stomach flipped as she thought of his soft voice by her ear...damn him! Then she thought of how he might possibly might be a felon and shook her head. She's just being stupid now.

"Of course not. He's too old for me, remember?"

Farkle chuckled, "That's never stopped you before."

She shook her head and bit back a smile at how persistent she was when it came to Josh. And then she remembered something before she flicked Farkle's forehead again.

"He's not my husband!"

* * *

Sitting down next to Riley, she could almost feel the chill from the cold shoulder she was getting. It's not like they usually greeted each other when they walked into class so that wasn't the reason Riley was upset.

Maya quickly glanced at Missy who was still shamelessly flirting with Lucas and thought that she couldn't be mad at that because Missy did that everyday. She even smelt herself and found there was nothing repulsive about her smell. So, what was she so mad a-

"How was your day yesterday?" Riley inquired suddenly. Years of being friends with the Matthews girl set an automatic alert to her brain as to why she was upset.

The blonde sighed, "Look, I'm sorry. Shawn just had one of those moments where he wanted to spend time with me but it also conflicted with school and-you know Shawn and his priorities." She dug through her bag to look for her sheet of paper with Riley's answers while Riley remained indifferent.

"I don't remember Air Bud being on in the morning."

"Well, we didn't watch Air Bud. We did other stuff and I didn't think you'd care if I was gone for a day."

Riley turned on her stool to look at her like she was completely appalled, "I don't! You can do whatever you want. It's not like I was worried you were gone because of me." She said the last part so low that Maya almost thought she misheard her. Riley Matthews was worried about what she did? Since when?

"Why would I be gone because of you?"

"I don't know, we were finally starting to talk like we were...never mind." She hastily went back to doodling on the margin of her paper and twisting the hem of her dress.

"Riley!" Maya called and she stopped her nervous actions, "I wasn't gone because of you, okay? I was...just busy." For a brief moment, she wanted to tell Riley about Josh staying with them. She wanted to tell her about how nervous she had been seeing him again and how he thought she was beautiful. But then Riley turned and her eyes focused on something to Maya's right.

Two people to be specific and it was Missy and Lucas. And if Maya hadn't known her for so long, she would've guessed that she longed to be with them. But she did know her (at least her tells) and it seemed that she didn't want to be with them, she wanted to be with...

She smirked, "Something interesting over there, Riles?" Riley turned and looked like a deer in headlights as her cheeks flushed pink and she hastily began to doodle on her paper again.

"N-No. No, definitely not. Why would you say that?"

"Because you're kind of staring at Luca-"

"Shhh!" She hushed her and Maya almost laughed how childish she was being.

"What's the big deal, isn't he your friend?"

Riley rolled her eyes, "Yes, he's my _friend_," She practically spat the word, "My friend who's hooking up with Missy and doesn't even find me remotely attractive. My friend who only thinks of me as one of Missy's minions. My friend who will never..." She blinked her eyes and seemed to realize where she was and who she was talking to.

She felt guilty. And angry at Missy for being a bad friend, "Riley, why don't you just tell her tha_—_"

"That what?" Riley hissed, her voice was low so no one could hear but it only made Maya worry, "Do you know Missy Bradford? She would never give up something she 'won'. Besides, I already said he doesn't like me anyway."

"That's a load of crap and you know it. She's probably lying an_—_"

"Maya, stop." Riley warned.

But she couldn't. She already thought Missy Bradford was a stone cold bitch but now she knew that she was heartless too. It's like she didn't even care if her friend was happy. "No. How could you want to be with friends with such a manipulative asshol_—_"

"I said stop!" The buzzing of voices in the background stopped as Riley's voice echoed. All eyes were on them but all Maya could focus on was the brown eyes in front of her that looked absolutely livid. The bell rang and the classroom came to life again but she was still in shock. People filed out, Riley had been the first one out of her seat and Maya didn't blame her.

She began to put away the papers she didn't even fill out when her eyes looked at the next question they were meant to be answering, **if you could go back and change one decision you made, what would you change?**

Oh the irony.

* * *

Thankfully, Farkle's day was eventful too. He was so caught up in his story about Isadora that he failed to ask her what breaking news occurred in eighth period with the royals.

"She hired kids from the choir to come sing to me in the bathroom. And this wasn't as awkward as you may think because I wasn't peeing. I was in the stall! I was listening to acapella barber shop quartet music. Do you know how weird that is? And then they slipped a card under the stall with her voice singing the finale. She was asking me to ask her to prom."

"Well, I'd definitely vote the two of you prom king and queen."

"Only if you want your funeral before graduation."

Maya lightly punched his arm, "I think you're missing out. Because there are times when I talk to her and she doesn't bring you up," He gave her a look, "The whole time."

[*]

Sleep was something she craved desperately.

Too much has happened and she needed to give her mind a break. The Matthews family was beginning to give her a migraine. She sighed and then turned over, her eyelids felt heavy and she began to welcome sleep eagerly.

_Thump. Thump. Thump._

Her eyes open as she curiously looked towards the source of the noise.

Her window.

Please don't be a weird homeless guy. Please don't be a weird homeless guy.

Another knock, "Maya. Maya, open up. It's me."

And that lovely voice she knew very well. She practically launched herself at the window when she realized he was there. Lifting up the window, she was ready to yell at him. Even when he sent her his breathless smile that made her heart race. "What the hell are you doing on the fire escape?"

"You almost sound like you're not happy to see me." He answered, stepping into her room and looking around like he was impressed.

"Good," She said, "Because I'm not."

Josh approached her and tucked a piece of fallen hair behind her ear, "You're a bad liar, gorgeous." The rough surface of his thumb softly slid across her cheek before he pulled his hand back into his jean pockets. It was beginning to become pathetic at how easily this boy could take her breath away.

"S-Stop distracting me! Where were you?"

He tilted his head and looked at her like she was the most amusing thing he's ever seen, "Why? Were you worried about me?"

"No!" She yelled and instantly realized her mistake covered her mouth. It didn't seem like Shawn or her mother heard so then she continued, "I just_—_"

"Because you don't need to worry about me. I'm fine. Okay?"

"Okay but_—_" Maya was cut off when he began to step away from her. She really needed to get her interrogation story prepared before he was actually in the room. Because the dopey smiles and his dreamy dark eyes were going to kill her.

"Good night, Maya."

Just because she was stubborn, she opened her mouth to argue about him being vague. How did she know that he wasn't lying to her so she wouldn't tell Shawn? Instead of a continuation of an argument, she managed to squeak, "Good night, Josh."


	5. i don't want to bore you, gorgeous

It shouldn't have been a surprise when Maya went to the kitchen in the morning and only found Shawn.

The poor boy was probably still tired from avoiding her questions all night. She angrily bit into her sandwich just thinking about how much he aggravated her. Who did he think he was? He could just waltz into her room and then completely avoid interrogation. She could snitch now that she thought about it but it the thought was dismissed because Maya didn't like that title for herself.

She shouldn't be thinking this much on a Friday, she should be thinking about what her plans are for the weekend. Oh, who was she kidding? Her and Farkle's definition of plans was going over the other's house and napping. Not that she minded that much but still, the two of them were as lame as it came.

Shawn was now giving her odd looks and she realized she must look kind of ridiculous being deep in thought with pieces of her sandwich in her mouth. It was safe to say that she should probably refrain from thinking so much in the morning.

* * *

"He didn't throw rocks at your window?" Farkle asked once more. It seemed that every time she explained the things that happen when he's not there, he seems to find the exact question that'll irritate her the most and then asks it. She told him about how Josh mysteriously knocked on her window and avoided all her questions, she failed to mention him calling her gorgeous because she could already feel her stomach filling with butterflies at the mere thought of it.

Maya rolled her eyes, "No, I don't think that was his intention anyway. He keeps avoiding the question and I hate it. I hate not knowing things."

"I know," Farkle groaned, "I couldn't even throw you a surprise birthday party because you demanded to know why I kept ditching you."

"I had the right to know. You left me with Isadora the whole month! I love you and all but hearing Isadora talk about you 24/7 was probably the worst time of my life. I honestly don't know why she's so obsessed."

"Hey!" He objected as he followed their usual path of turns and traffic lights to get to school.

"I meant, why isn't she obsessed enough. The shrine she has of you in her room is completely well deserved." Maya said slyly and watched as Farkle's eyes practically bulged out of his head,

"What?!"

[*]

Ms. Kelly moved the English class to the library while men came in to inspect their windows. Apparently some teacher complained about a draft though it wasn't cold outside at all. Ms. Kelly didn't mind it though, she said that we should all go to the library because some of us don't know what actual books look like.

Maya was almost offended.

Though having to move to the library gave Maya a reason not to say anything on the way upstairs. Riley's little outburst yesterday hadn't left her mind and the annoyance that she felt sadly wouldn't go away either. Why did she freak out so much? It's not like anyone would care at this point, all-better yet most of the seniors were mature now. Petty gossip wasnt' so popular anymore.

Because she didn't know why Riley was so mad, she decided to play the ignoring game as well. It worked up until Riley leaned over the table looking apologetic. She opened her mouth to speak but what came out wasn't her voice.

It was the principal's.

"Attention everyone. This is a code red. This is a drill. I repeat..."

Code reds weren't really as intense as they seemed. Everyone would have to hide under or behind something and try to stay completely quiet.

Tried being the key word.

Maya could remember a couple being caught making out behind the teacher's desk. She was just surrounded by so many mature people...

So, in the fashion of usual code reds, everyone started whispering. For the first time, Maya actually sat silently. Riley would look like she was about to say something and then shut her mouth until finally,

"I'm sorry I yelled at you." She said in a normal voice which was the code red equivalent to screaming. Someone under a desk neared them shushed them but continued their own conversation.

"What?"

"I'm sorry I yelled at you. I shouldn't have done that and I know I overreacted but there's just a lot you don't know." Her voice faded sadly and Maya would've tried her best to try to come up with something to cheer her up, a body smashed into her own.

Her blonde head turned and she was completely ready to give that person a piece of her mind until, "Ladies." A smooth voice said.

"Farkle." They acknowledged. Riley looked surprised and not disgusted like Maya had imagined. Instead, she looked a little happy.

"What are you doing outside of your classroom? Aren't the doors closed?" Riley inquired, Farkle waved her off casually as if he snuck out all the time.

"Don't worry about it, doll. I heard from one of the janitors this morning about the code red during eighth period and I just didn't feel like spending my time surrounded by idiot jocks."

Then someone else slid under the table and it made Riley turn the color of a tomato.

"Lucas." The two friends stated.

"Farkle. Maya." He nodded to them before turning his attention to the blushing girl to his right, "Riley."

Her head shot up from its previous position of looking down and she grinned, "Lucas there hi!" She realized her mistake immediately and covered her face with her hands.

Maya was almost in shock when she caught Lucas' look of admiration when he looked at Riley. An idea immediately came to mind, "I think Farkle and I should go hide under a different table."

"What?" Riley exclaimed suddenly and latched onto Maya's arm, "No. You can't leave."

Carefully, she pulled the girl's hand away while smirking mischievously, "But I can and I'm going to. See you two later."

Farkle quickly followed behind her as she crawled under two desks before settling on a safe distance from her previous spot.

He glanced from Maya's nonchalant figure the awkward couple a few desks away, "What was that?"

"What was what?"

He raised his eyebrows before flipping his imaginary hair over his shoulder, "I'm Maya and I'm going to leave my ex best friend with the most popular guy in school." Farkle even added a giggle (something she rarely does) in his little bit too.

"Okay, one: I don't talk like that and second: I'm just doing her a favor. She'll thank me later I guarantee."

"You think you're helping her?"

"I know I'm helping her. I'm a helpful person, for example," She tried looking around until she found what she was looking for, "Isadora!"

Maya was shushed about a dozen times before the girl she called actually made it to their desk. Farkle's never had a more murderous look on his face.

[*]

Friday night. What was she supposed to do? Sleeping would be dumb, right? Yet, here she was. Laying in her bed thinking about how lame of a weekend she was having. She should be having the time of her life. Shawn and her mother were out to dinner, leaving the house completely empty.

Farkle asked if she wanted to go over and play cards with him and his dad and it was only at this moment did she find the offer appealing.

_Thump. Thump. Thump. _

That couldn't be...

She turned in her bed to see a smiling Joshua Matthews on her fire escape. She should've ignored him, she should've chosen to do something else.

"Maya. Are you awake?" He knocked again before she finally got up and opened the window.

"Are you kidding me? Did you forget your keys or something?"

"Well no."

She sighed as he climbed through the window, "You could've used the door. Shawn isn't here, you know?"

"Where's the fun in that?" And he shot her a lopsided grin.

"Fine, whatever. Are you going to tell me where you were now?" Her hands were on her hips as she tried to keep her thoughts together. Especially at that moment when he draped himself across her bed and she could imagine the smell of his cologne staying behind.

"Aw c'mon. I don't want to bore you, gorgeous."

"Bore me? You're sneaking out to do boring stuff?" She said slowly. He was horrible at making excuses.

Josh nodded, "Yep."

"Like what? Shopping for milk? Feeding the pigeons?"

He chuckled, "You know, your persistence is kind of attractive, gorgeous."

"Would you quit calling me that?" Maya yelled.

"Why? It suits you."

Her cheek temperature was going up quicker than she ever thought it could, "Just quit it."

"You're acting like you've never heard anyone say that to you." He said incredulously.

"Because I haven't!" The conversation was starting to get more and more embarrassing. It was supposed to be an interrogation about where Josh was not the minimal attention she receives from boys.

Josh rose from her bed and walked towards her with the most serious face she's ever seen him wear, "Then I guess I'll have to call you gorgeous until you're used to it."

It was amazing how easily he could make he blush, almost as easy as it was for him to change the subject. Maya refused to let him leave without telling her where he'd been, "Ugh! Stop complimenting me!"

He tilted his head at her while looking both confused and amused, "That's one I haven't heard before."

"You're just so unbelievable. First, you completely ignore my question about where you were and then you keep flirt–I mean flattering me."

"You really want to know where I was?" Josh sauntered over to her, closing the distance between them. She kept trying to make sure that she didn't mess up again this time. He was finally going to tell her.

"Yes."

"You sure?" Their faces were only a few centimeters away and Maya felt like she was losing focus. It got worse when he intertwined their fingers.

"Yes." She breathed as he dipped his head. He was going to actually...? Then she saw him turn his head and pecked her cheek.

It shouldn't have effected her but nothing made sense when it came to her and Josh. The slight upturning of his lips was probably the cherry on top of the mass explosion of butterflies in her stomach because...damn, he was cute.

"Why did you do that?" She internally cringed at how shaky her voice came out.

"Because I don't like seeing you worry. Especially about a guy like me."

"What do you mean?" She asked suddenly curious. Josh gave her a look of something she couldn't quite put her finger on but her thoughts floated away as he lifted her hand and placed a kiss on the back of it.

"Well, there's a lot you don't know. Good night, gorgeous." Said Josh as he dropped her hand and made his way to the door.

"Good night."

Maya was still left thinking after Josh left, what was he talking about? 


	6. so do i

Weekends were the best.

Sleeping in was probably one of things Maya enjoyed most though. And after the week she had, she needed some extra sleep and comfort.

She woke up around noon perfectly content. She could watch some Netflix and stuff her face. She was only weirdly happy because it was the weekend. It had nothing to do with a certain boy that seemed to enjoy climbing through her window.

Nope, definitely not.

"I was about to check you. It's not winter anymore, you don't need to hibernate." Said Shawn after Maya walked into the kitchen. Shawn had a strange smile on his face like he'd just won the lottery.

And he was putting food on a wooden tray, he even put orange juice and he hates orange juice. "Why are you making that?" Maya said as she continued to eye the tray. Her stomach grumbled which would explain her sudden interest in his breakfast.

Then strolled in Joshua with his sexy bedhead and crooked grin, "For the naked woman in his bed."

Shawn beamed at the mention of it and didn't look embarrassed in the slightest. Maya almost gagged.

"Next time just...ignore me." Her eyes were shut tight, wishing away the image of Shawn and her mother having sex.

The two men laughed as the look of disgust remained on her face. Maya grabbed an apple before heading into the living room and plopping on the old black leather couch. Josh walked in moments later, Maya was surprised the two of them didn't share secrets like the usually did when she wasn't in the room.

Moments later, Josh and Shawn sat down on either side of her on the couch.

"What are we watching?" Asked Shawn. She rolled her eyes, she just wanted to watch some stuff on Netflix.

"_We_ weren't watching anything. _I_ was watching Once Upon A Time." Maya answered sassily when she saw Shawn eyeing the remote.

"Well, maybe you should be considerate of the people in the living room." He suggested.

Maya pretended to consider it then shook her head, "Not gonna happen." She wished someone would've told her what was in store for her once she continued watching

They spent their day watching all of season 2 which included unnecessary comments from Shawn and Josh. Especially when Captain Hook (the sexiest man ever) was on screen.

Each had found a different way to be annoying. Shawn would keep questioning Captain Hook's fashion choices,

"Is he wearing eyeliner?" Shawn asked but was quickly hushed by a lovesick Maya. The couch was the only thing supporting her as she leaned closer to watch.

"He is showing an inappropriate amount of chest hair. Is that why you watch this show?" He glared at her before focusing his eyes on the screen.

As for Joshua, he remained completely enamored by Captain Hook and was giving him compliments,

"Do you think his eyes are just naturally that blue?" He whispered to her. With all the attention they were focusing on him, it made it more difficult to find him attractive.

"Do you think I would look good with a beard?" Josh rubbed his chin, imagining what it would feel like.

But then that wasn't even the worst part was when Josh pointed out how Captain Hook bluntly would flirt with Emma, "Why does he keep trying to be with that blonde chick?"

"Because he has a thing for blondes." Maya replied sarcastically, wishing everyone would shut up and let her watch her show in peace. She thought she heard his familiar husky laughter before he murmured, "So do I." And he was looking at the screen, popping fruit snacks into his mouth with a side smirk playing on his lips.

Asshole.

Though the night took a different turn when Josh got up to go to the bathroom. Shawn took the remote from her lap and raised the volume before turning to face her, "Kiddo, you didn't happen to mention Josh being here to anyone, right?"

"Just Farkle."

"Good," He breathed, "I really need you to keep that information to yourself."

"Why? Is he wanted by the FBI?" She joked but Shawn didn't even crack a smile. Then Josh staying here wasn't just some extended sleepover thing. Something serious had to have happened if he needed to stay with them in secret.

Shawn shook his head, "No. I just need you to keep quiet. Don't tell anyone that would want to know, like Riley."

"When was the last time Riley came around here? I already told you that her and I don't talk anymore." Yes, she was lying but he hadn't been honest with her before so Maya didn't see the point in suddenly being honest with him now.

"Just in case. Don't tell anyone. I mean it, Maya."

"Okay, okay. Jeez, I guess I'll have to cancel my conference with TMZ then?" A pillow to the face followed soon after her snarky remark.

* * *

After Farkle failed to answer any of Maya's texts she left her room (where she had resided for the last hour so she could tell Farkle about what Josh was doing) and returned to the living room to find Shawn gone and Joshua playing Shawn's Wii and swearing under his breath.

There was a crash that came from the screen and he threw his hands in the air in frustration, "That guy totally cheated!" Amused, she stepped in more to see what had captured his complete attention.

Josh was upset over Mario Kart.

"Are you serious?" She put her bowl of grapes down along with her phone and sat down next to him as she watched race again. Josh would furrow his eyebrows in the cutest way she's ever seen while his tongue poked out of the corner of his mouth; he looked so much younger than he really was. It was ironic because he seemed to love the fact that he was and looked older than everyone else.

"Completely serious. I was just about to cross the finish line on my last lap and then suddenly a blue shell comes and hits me! I finished in fifth place! You'd be frustrated too."

"No. Because I'm actually good at this game."

His hands flew in the air again before he turned to her, "Oh? Then play me." And the way that he said it, Maya really should've thought about something being up. But alas, she was Maya Hart and Maya Hart never backed out of a challenge.

She grabbed the spare Wii remote that was on the coffee table by Josh's feet and was ready for him to put her in the game. She decided to go with Baby Mario because he was adorable and the only character she liked to play as.

Josh chose Bowser and they raced at Coconut Mall with Maya coming out in first place and Josh in eighth. The two raced again but in Bowser's Castle and ended up with the same result.

"Was that enough for you? Or do you want to go again?" She was practically on cloud nine. Winning was probably the best feeling, Maya thought to herself. She was surprised that she didn't feel bad for Josh who was pouting and looked like a little kid who was just put on time out.

"I'll admit it. You're extremely good at this game, gorgeous. But we should make things more interesting, right?"

"Sure."

His brown eyes drifted to the ceiling as he pretended to think, "If I win, you have to tell me a secret."

"All right and _when_ I win, I want you to tell me what you've been doing out so late."

Immediately his hand shot out for her to shake and she shook it. Blame the euphoria of victory which blinded her good judgement because Josh suddenly passed her the moment they started the race. It was unbelievable how quickly he got the front and how far away he was from the rest of the racers.

One look at his face told her that he planned all of it. An impish grin was plastered on his face as he crossed the finish line on his last lap. Though she did finish second place.

But she got played.

"You were never bad at this game were you?" said Maya in disbelief. He winked at her.

"That depends on how you define bad. Because to me, I was having an off day."

Maya reached out for a pillow and threw it at his face, "How is this even fair? You tricked me!"

Josh's hands shot out to protect his face before the pillow could hit him as he laughed, "Hey, I didn't tell you to get cocky. I actually didn't expect you to but the fact that you were made winning so much more fun."

"I hate you." She said coldly.

"Wow, I almost believed you. Now, c'mon. Fess up."

Before her thoughts could come together to tell Josh something minor, her mouth moved on it's on accord, "I'm talking to Riley again."

"You are? That's good, you two were so close," He opened his mouth like he was ready to say something but then shook his head like if he thought better of it.

"What is it?"

Hesitantly, his eyes met her own, "I just never knew what happened between you two for you guys to stop talking to each other." Maya sighed and Josh instantly backtracked, "But you don't have to tell me! It's none of my business. My mouth just doesn't know when to shut up sometimes, like right now."

It was sort of funny seeing Josh get flustered because of her, usually it was the other way around.

"No, I'll tell you; that was part of the deal," She took a deep breath thinking about the story that she hated telling, "Riley and I entered our freshman year not knowing many people other than Lucas, Farkle and Isadora. During lunch, Missy invited the two of us to join her along with Lucas, Farkle and Isadora. She was weirdly nice to all of us, it was almost like she matured since middle school. Almost is the key word here. Later on, she would compliment Riley randomly and ask to hang out with us. Riley and I had no classes together while Missy and her had four, so they got really close. Riley had been doing stuff that wasn't really stuff _her_, she's blow off her parents or lie about where she was. And we would argue about it all the time. Then my birthday came around and I thought I could spend it with Riley, Farkle and even Lucas but Riley had other plans..."

_The blindfold really was a dead giveaway. But the muffled giggles and musky smell in the air was unexpected. Quickly, Riley tore off the blindfold and revealed that they were in a dimly lit party where everyone jumped out and screamed, "Surprise!"_

_Riley's smiling face appeared before her as the music began blasting again and people returned to what they're doing. The gesture was nice but Maya couldn't help but feel out of place. She didn't know anyone besides Riley and she felt like her time with her best friend was going to be cut short._

_"Happy birthday, Maya!" a voice said from behind her and she turned to see Missy with a plastic cup in her hands, grinning. Her uncomfortable feeling grew._

_"Thanks." Immediately after she thanked her, Missy grabbed Riley by the arm and whispered something that made her best friend gasp and look at Maya apologetically. _

_"I'll be right back, I swear."_

_"Yeah, sure." She smiled forcefully after they disappeared. To say it was a horrible birthday would be the understatement of the century. Maya had made her way upstairs to an empty bedroom where she'd hope to feel a little bit better but it didn't work. _

_Shawn was texting her, asking her how her birthday with Riley was going and she didn't have the heart to tell him how horrible it was. It was only three hours she had been alone but it felt like years. Finally, she text Farkle to come pick her up. On her way down the stairs, she ran into an intoxicated Riley._

_"Maya! It's the birthday girl, everyone." She screamed to the crowd of people who paid no mind to her. Her long arm draped over Maya's shoulder as the smell of liquor wafted into Maya's face._

_"Glad you still remember."_

_Riley squinted her eyes, looking confused, "What is that supposed to mean? I threw you a party!"_

_"You didn't throw me anything. You took me to a party, where you had people who were totally wasted scream surprise to someone they don't even know. Then you left me alone, wondering if you were even still at this stupid party."_

_"I can't believe how ungrateful you sound. I was trying to make you have fun, it's not my fault you're so antisocial."_

_Her blue eyes were practically bulging out of her head in disbelief, "_Me_? At least I don't have to turn into a completely different person just so people will like me. And all the people here have a lower IQ than Auggie."_

_"You're really unbelievable. Missy and I-"_

_"Missy! That explains everything! No wonder you thought this party was a good idea."_

_"What does that have to do with Missy?"_

_Maya could feel her nails digging into her palms because of how tightly her fists were balled up. She was grateful for the loud music because she really didn't want the whole party to listen to what they were saying, "You're head is so far up her ass that you don't even care about what I like anymore. All I wanted was a party with my friends and I don't see any of mine here."_

"I didn't talk to her and I told Farkle about how selfish she was and how she destroyed what was supposed to be a good day for me. Farkle was so pissed at what she said, he refused to talk to her. I didn't either but she came to me because she couldn't remember what happened and I didn't tell her but I told her that we needed space from each other. I was hoping that, that would wake her up but she just looked hurt and didn't talk to me since then. I knew that her and Missy aren't that great of friends anymore either so I just thought that maybe the Riley I knew was back." Only after she was finished did she realize that Josh had grabbed hold of her hand and was rubbing his thumb on the back of it.

"I'm so sorry that you had to talk about that."

"No, I needed to share it. The fight was dumb and she became someone I didn't recognize, so it was better we ended it then." She wasn't even convincing herself.

"And you're still talking to her now?"

"You think I shouldn't?" Her voice showed how vulnerable she became when it came to Riley and the look on Josh's face told her that he knew too.

"I think that your friendship is something people envy. Riley is impressionable and probably realized her mistake in losing you as a friend. If deep down you know that this will end badly, then don't do it. But I think Riley is worth a second chance."

"Me too."


	7. i guess i was really crazy about him

Waking up felt weird.

There was an arm wrapped strongly around her waist and she could feel someone's breath blowing on her forehead. Her eyes opened when she took in the musky cologne scent, to her surprise (and horror) the person she was cuddling with was Josh.

This was bad. So, so bad.

Especially because everything in her body was telling her not to leave that spot on the...couch? Maya didn't really knew where they were and if they were on the couch, that meant that Shawn must've seen them. If he did, he probably took a picture so he could humiliate her later. Though her sapphire eyes didn't stray from Josh's peaceful face to search for her stepdad.

It was strange being so close to him and seeing how peaceful he looked. Pieces of ebony hair had fallen in the front of his face and she gently pushed them away. He looked so young when he was asleep, his skin was clear of any stress or acne and his lips were...

No! She shouldn't be looking at his lips. No matter how soft they look or how they would feel against her own...

She needed to leave. The guy was asleep and was still making her heart race and her mind think inappropriately. All of a sudden she felt the arm around her waist tighten as he brought her closer to his chest. He grumbled, "Gorgeous?"

Why did his morning voice have to sound attractive too? Maya's shut immediately, hoping that if he saw that she was asleep then he'll go back to sleep too. Her plan worked when Josh stopped trying to adjust them and his breath evened out again.

Carefully, she lifted his arm off her waist and rolled off the couch and onto the floor. Her phone was on the table and checked the time, it was eleven o'clock. Her and Josh must've stayed up really late.

Memories rushed into her mind while she went to her room to put on some sneakers, she couldn't be in the house when Josh woke up. Instead of acknowledging the awkward cuddling he'd probably say something charming about her absence like, "I missed you this morning, gorgeous."

And she was definitely sticking around to hear it and blush like some lovestruck school girl.

Grabbing her keys from her nightstand, she made her way to the living room, past Josh's sleeping figure and out the door. Some fresh air would surely do her some good.

* * *

What type of best friend doesn't pick up their phone?

Farkle Minkus, that's who. He still hadn't responded to the mass of texts she sent him last night about Josh and how she told him about her and Riley. She even text him about how Shawn told her to keep Josh's presence at their house a secret (for reasons still unknown to her).

Did Shawn know that Josh was sneaking out every night or was she supposed to keep that a secret too? Her mind would drift off to last night as the continued to walk the long blocks of Manhattan.

_"So, how about another game? I promise to go easy on you this time." It was like he knew exactly what to say to take her mind off of Riley because she immediately looked at him with lifting her eyebrow, challenging him. _

_"Is that so? You're too kind."_

_"Only for you. Want to race on Rainbow Road again?" Maya nodded and they were off racing again and talking trash about the other. Then for some reason (she blames it on the fact that it was midnight and she was tired) Maya moved her body so she was laying horizontally with her feet on the arm of the couch and her head on Josh's lap._

_Mid race, he suddenly froze as he slowly looked down to find Maya staring at the TV. She looked as comfortable as ever laying there and it took a few moments for Josh to get his mind away from the blonde in his lap and onto the game._

_Once he was focused again, he was in first place with Maya close in second. And (because she was tired and feeling ballsy all of a sudden) she decided to tickle his side. The most adorable and boyish laugh she's ever heard escaped his lips then while he twitched so he could avoid her wandering fingers._

_"Maya! No, you're gonna make me lose!" He kept moving his remote higher up due to the fact that she completely abandoned her own remote and was dedicated to sabotaging him._

_"Good. Next time, you won't cheat." Maya was up and chest to chest with him also making sure to block his view of the TV._

_At the end of their struggle, Josh ended up getting tenth place. His dark eyes were practically warning her that was what to come next wasn't going to benefit Maya whatsoever._

_His nimble fingers reached out and met her waist before running along her ribs, his muscled arms trapped her in his embrace, "Josh, stop." She said in between breaths._

_"Not until you apologize." Josh was grinning and chuckling at her outbursts of laughter. She shook her head as his evil fingers continued their journey over her cotton t-shirt. _

_"In your dreams, Matthews."_

_A creak from the master bedroom was what put an end to their fun. Josh placed his hand over Maya's mouth to stop her giggling as they waited to see if Shawn or her mother were awake. _

_Nothing happened so Josh turned his attention to the strangely giddy girl beneath him, "What's up with you, smiley?" Something wet slid across his palm before he pulled his hand away from her mouth in disgust. _

_"Real mature." _

_She stuck her tongue out at him and moved to get up but once her feet touched the hardwood floor, Josh grabbed her waist and pulled her back to him, "Josh!" She exclaimed._

_"You can't leave until you apologize." He mumbled into her hair. She twisted around so that she could look at him, though she regretted it because they were extremely close._

_"Then I guess I'm not leaving."_

_And she could've sworn that he whispered, "Good."_

Completely annoyed (with Josh for being annoyingly charming and at Farkle for ignoring her), she decided to leave Farkle voicemails as well.

"You better be dead because there is really no other reason you're not answering my texts or calls."

"Seriously, Farkle? I kind of need someone to talk to."

"I could be in the forest being mauled by a bear and you wouldn't know because you refuse to answer your phone!"

"This is the last time I call you for advice! I don't need it anyway."

There would've been more voicemails to come because Maya was relentless but the sound of someone crying stopped her. Her subconscious had led her to Washington Square Park which was far enough away from Josh that she wasn't worried.

What worried her was the familiarity of the crying. Maya kept walking in the direction of the melancholy sound until she spotted cinnamon brown hair cascading over the face of Riley Matthews.

She was sitting on a stone bench with her head in her hands and people passing her by, looking curiously. Maya would've been disgusted with what people found so interesting about Riley being upset but then again, she herself was curious. Riley should be happy, she got to spend twenty minutes uninterrupted, talking to Lucas Friar (the boy she supposedly wants to marry).

"Riley?" Maya said uncertainly even though she was absolutely it _was_ Riley.

Abruptly, she lifted her head and looked around before her eyes landed on the small blonde girl in front of her, "Maya! Uh, hi."

Maybe she should've just kept walking.

No! Riley seemed like she needed someone to talk to based on how upset she looked. Her brown eyes were red and puffy and her cheeks looked blotchy. She wasn't wearing what typical royals wore, she just wore sweats, a hoodie and her beat up beige (originally white) converse.

"Are you okay? Did something happen?" Without an invitation, Maya took it upon herself to sit on the bench next to her ex best friend, ready to listen.

But she simply shook her head, "It's not a big deal. I'm just overreacting, besides I'm sure you have better things to do then listen to the dumb things that are happening in my life."

Not really...

Besides, maybe she could subtly tell Riley about the conflicting emotions she's been having with Josh.

"No, it isn't. You can't keep that stuff inside, you know. It's bad for us teenagers."

Her brown eyes flicked around Maya's face, searching for any sort of tell that she was lying but Maya was sincere. Anything that was bothering Riley, she wanted to know about.

"Fine, but when I say it out loud, I feel like it's going to sound really stupid."

Maya rolled her eyes, "Just tell me!"

"So, I like this guy and I know that we can't date. It shouldn't bother me what he does and doesn't do but somehow it still does. Anyway, the guy, well I saw him kiss a girl and it just made me awful. For some reason, I thought maybe the guy liked me. It's stupid right?" The whole time, her eyes remained focused on the tainted concrete ground beneath them.

"You're too harsh on yourself sometimes, Riles. If you and the guy you like are meant to be then it'll happen, if not then you shouldn't worry about it. Any guy would be lucky to have you."

Riley sniffled, "It's weird hearing you talk about fate because the last guy that you were interested in was Uncle Josh and you didn't seem to care about fate at all." Then she laughed at the blush that came across Maya's cheeks. Even when she was blocks away, she couldn't escape that boy.

"Yeah, I guess I was really crazy about him."


	8. hearts in his eyes

Surely it was pathetic how Maya avoided Josh.

She came home late after spending the day with Riley and was grateful that Josh wasn't in sight. Shawn waited up for her and asked where she'd been and she lied.

It was dumb and it wasn't like she couldn't tell Shawn anything but she was afraid he would react like Farkle had and yell at her. As much as she didn't like to admit it, Josh was the only one who didn't judge her decision and make her feel like an idiot by talking to Riley.

Maya overslept and woke up to a bunch of texts from Farkle, so the idiot was still alive. He was just an ass and didn't like to respond to her messages. Shawn wasn't in the kitchen which was probably the reason she overslept and there was a cold sandwich and coffee waiting on the table which she took quickly before dashing out the door.

"Sleeping in today?" Farkle asked, looking at her gold mess that she called hair. Grumpily, she got in the car and dropped her bag on the floor while she tried to fix the ponytail she made a few minutes ago.

"You're talking to me now? I probably left you more than fifty voicemails and texts but apparently you were too busy to talk to your best friend." She flipped her head and grabbed all of her hair to make a high ponytail.

Farkle didn't look the least bit apologetic, instead he rolled his eyes, "Don't be dramatic. I actually have a legitimate reason for not answering you."

"Oh please share. I want to know why I couldn't talk to my best friend in my time of need."

If Maya had been paying attention to his face instead of fixing the flyaways on her head, she would've seen the faint redness that graced her friend's cheeks.

He cleared his throat, "Well, the reason I didn't answer my phone on Saturday was because I went to a party. "

That got her attention. The bobby pin that had been in her mouth fell out while her mouth hung open, "You?! You never go to parties."

"Correction, I never go anywhere. But anyway, Lucas invited me to go to a party with him and I went. I'm sad to say that I gave into peer pressure and had a few drinks and I don't remember much after that. Though I _do_ remember a girl and she was beautiful and amazing and we...slept together."

Shock wouldn't be a strong enough word for Maya at that moment. Her nerdy best friend lost his virginity to some girl at a party. And she was worried about cuddling with Josh...

"You slept with a girl? Do you remember who it was?"

"That's the problem. I don't remember her face, I just remember being really happy when I was with her."

"Because you had sex with her." She guessed and was slightly disgusted at the thought.

Farkle looked insulted, "Of course not! I actually like this girl."

"Except you don't know who it was and there might be a chance they don't even go to our school."

"I don't care, I'm gonna find her. I've never felt this way about anyone."

She lifted her eyebrows in disbelief and he chuckled, "Well, I've never felt this way about anyone in high school."

* * *

"Hey, you feeling better?" Maya asked Riley after entering the classroom and taking a seat next to her.

"Yeah, I'm sorry about...crying. That must've been really weird for you." She looked awkward and shy which was strange because Maya has never seen her ex best friend act that way.

"I'm fine, but you're allowed to be upset about things, ya' know?" Maya grabbed the paper out of her bag and placed the paper on the table.

"I know," Riley nodded, "It's just that I think I should save my tears for something more meaningful."

Once their stuff was together with Ms. Kelly walking around observing everyone, they began answering the questions, "What are your best qualities?" Maya read from the paper and rolled her eyes, "I'm starting to think this isn't English anymore because it sounds a little like therapy."

"Watch your tongue, Ms. Hart. Wouldn't want you and Ms. Matthews to lose points just because you can't filter your thoughts." said Ms. Kelly who was closer to the pair of girls than she thought.

"Of course, Ms. Kelly. That was so rude of me, I'll make sure to whisper next time." She answered with a smile and Riley put a hand over her mouth to muffle her giggles.

Glaring, their teacher made her way around the classroom, "Just get to work, Maya."

The blonde saluted before her attention returned to the brunette beside her.

"I guess subtly won't be one of the qualities we write down?" Riley laughed.

"No one told her to but in to our conversation. Besides, this stuff will be done by the end of the week anyway."

"I don't like this stuff, I never know what to write about myself." Riley nervously eyed the paper.

"Fine, I'll make it easier. How about I find stuff to say about you and you think of stuff to say about me, deal?"

The Matthews girl nodded happily before taking a pen from her purse and scribbling stuff down. Maya looked at her own paper and thought long and hard about what Riley's good qualities were.

Retelling the fight that broke up their friendship should've reminded Maya as to why the two hadn't spoken in so long. Yet, she didn't find the heart to write anything bad about her ex best friend. Writing good things about Riley felt easy.

Kind

Friendly

Excitable

Modest

There was more but Riley had cleared her throat to get her attention, "I wrote down five, how many did you write?"

"Um, I only wrote four because you didn't really give me more time."

Her face dropped a little but she tried smiling anyway, looking down at what she'd written with content, "That's fine, we'll just do four. I wrote funny, outspoken, witty, brave and loyal."

There was sadness in her face after saying the last one and Maya thought she actually looked guilty. And she kept looking at her with those sad brown eyes that were begging for her to answer her or contradict her.

Anything but stay silent.

"I didn't know being outspoken was a good thing." Said Maya with a closed lipped smile.

"Only for you, you practically say whatever you want and don't regret anything. I'm kind of jealous." Riley sighed.

A smirk appeared on Maya's lips as she lifted her eyebrow curiously at the girl beside her, "Like for what? A certain cowboy perhaps?" And she turned her head to look at him before Riley turned her around, blushing furiously.

"Would you cut it out?! I still haven't forgotten how you left me alone with him during the code red." She hissed under her breath.

"I was doing you a favor. You're gonna try to tell me that you weren't glad that you two were alone? It was lucky that Missy was absent that day too. So, you're welcome."

"I wasn't happy about it, I don't like Lucas like that." It was obviously a lie but Maya tried not to let it show that she knew that.

"Fine, whatever you say."

Riley grumbled, "You know I wish there was some guy I could tease you with."

"You can tease me about Farkle."

"No, Farkle is...Farkle. I mean a guy that you find attractive." She realized her mistake only after Maya's smirk widened.

"Does that mean that you find Lucas attractive?"

"This is what I'm talking about! If I find out there's a guy in your life, you're never going to hear the end of it."

Maya's mind drifted to Josh and his shameless flirting and it made her feel warm and fuzzy. Then Shawn's stern voice appeared in her head, "Don't tell anyone that Josh is staying with us. I mean it, Maya."

Sure, she could disobey him and tell Riley that Josh is staying with them and being annoyingly charming to her but she didn't know what that would do to Josh. It could ruin his life, maybe that was an exaggeration but still...she cared about him enough to keep his secret.

"It's a good thing there isn't one then."

"Okay, so what did you writ-" The dismissal bell cut Riley off before Maya could say what was on her list.

"Sorry I kind of strayed from the project."

Riley rolled her eyes, "No, you're not. You hate doing work but I gotta go otherwise my ride will leave me, but I do want to know what you wrote." She ripped a piece of paper and wrote down something before sliding it over to Maya.

"What is this?" She asked looking at the ten digits she'd written down.

"My number, so you can text me your answers. Don't you need it?"

"Of course not, Riley. I already have your number, do you need mine?" Maya was really hoping the answer was no. It would be kind of humiliating to find out that she was the only one that kept the other's numbe-

"No, I would never delete your number. Why would you..." An alarm system must've gone off in her head because Riley immediately shut up and grew timid. The amount of time they would've stayed there standing like idiots couldn't be measured because Lucas's southern voice cut through the awkward silence,

"Riley, you coming?" He stood at the doorway with his bag slung over his shoulder and Missy peering into the half empty classroom with an annoyed look on her face.

"Yeah, I-I'm coming. I'll text you later, Maya." She whispered the last part before jogging over to the cowboy that practically had hearts in his eyes when he looked at her.


	9. i'm not your girlfriend

It was strange not having Josh disrupt her sleep the night before.

Apparently he had been in his room taking care of stuff on the phone by the time she got home and hadn't left to do who knows what. She couldn't listen in because he was whispering and it'd be too obvious if she put her ear on the door while Shawn was there.

Maya did receive a good night sleep though, Riley had texted her like she said and seemed really happy with how Maya described her.

She woke up stretching, ready to drink her coffee before she saw her mother's tan legs that led to her mother's half naked body. She definitely went blind.

"What the hell?!" Maya screeched before shielding her eyes. Her mom was at the stove cooking eggs with one of Shawn's button downs on and definite sex hair. Her husband was standing right next to her laughing at his stepdaughter's reaction.

"Maya Hart, watch your mouth!" Katy Hart was almost as red as her daughter. She slapped her Shawn's arm as he continued to laugh before crying, "You said she went to school already!"

"Did I? I must've confused the times. She doesn't leave at 6:30, she leaves at 7:30." He even hit his forehead like he had truly forgotten when Maya went to school. Because it wasn't like he saw her go to school everyday or anything.

"You're evil." Maya seethed with her hands still over her eyes.

"You know what? You can cook your own eggs." Maya heard the softs pats of her mother's feet hitting the tiled kitchen floor before it disappeared down the hall. It was then that she dropped her hands just in time to see Shawn speed down the hallway after her shouting, "Katy!"

Maya turned the stove off before groaning at the lack of her daily coffee and sandwich.

Why did her parents have to act like horny teenagers sometimes?

* * *

Having lunch with Farkle and Isadora is usually a treat in Maya's opinion.

Isadora would harass Farkle beyond comprehension and Maya would laugh. Farkle would grumble about life not being fair or why did (of all girls) Isadora have to find him attractive.

But today's lunch felt different. Other than the fact that Farkle was the one that couldn't shut up, Isadora had remained silent. There was no 'good afternoon' or 'I made you this sandwich'. She just picked at her PB&J while Farkle rambled on.

"I think I know a way to find her, Maya."

"Find who?"

"The girl I met at the party! I think I know a way to find her."

Maya quit playing with the lettuce in her salad, "Go on."

"I'm going to do interviews for the girl. I'll just put up posters and ask if the mystery girl is out there, she can come forward." He was beaming the whole time. Obviously, Farkle was proud of himself for coming up with such a brilliant idea except their was a flaw.

Every girl at this school thought Farkle was a dork, though Maya disagreed greatly. She didn't think the mystery girl would show her face just because of Farkle. But one look at his hopeful face told her that telling him the truth would crush him and she could never do that to Farkle. But she wouldn't let him humiliate himself either.

"Why don't you just forget about the girl, huh? There are plenty of girls here at John Quincy High." She grabbed his hand and squeezed it reassuringly but he didn't budge.

Farkle scoffed, "Funny, you say that. Since the person you have a crush on doesn't even go he-" A swift kick under the lunch table shut him up quickly.

"There are plenty of girls for him to date, right Isadora?" The girl in question squeaked before flushing and lowering her head more like she was trying to disappear. "Are you okay? Did something happen? Because you haven't said anything all day. Especially to Farkle, he bought a new turtleneck, did you see?"

She shook her head furiously, her braids slapping her chin. Maybe Isadora was having a bad day, maybe she was getting upset with Farkle talking about another girl in front of her. The latter was probably true so Maya decided to leave her alone for now.

Focusing back on Farkle seemed like she was back at square one, he was still back on his idea of finding the girl who apparently stole his heart by having sex with him.

Well, he sure knew how to pick them.

[*]

Maya was disappointed that the class actually had to have a lesson because Ms. Kelly was being observed that day (and spontaneous projects aren't really part of the curriculum) and she didn't get a chance to talk to Riley though the two made up for it by texting like crazy after school. Even Farkle (and all his girl from the party daze) thought the two were going a little overboard with their texting.

"What could you two possibly be talking about for two hours?" Farkle groaned stretching his lanky limbs across Maya's bed.

"We're talking about how beautiful Leonardo DiCaprio looked in the 90's." She said it like it was obvious.

"I thought we were going go over Physics. You know the thing you didn't get while you were in school? The class you don't have with Riley."

Her pale fingers skimming quickly over her phone screen told Farkle that she wasn't listening to him at all. An idea popped into his head and it was something that he knew would get Maya mad but he needed her attention just for today and then she could text Riley to her heart's content.

Farkle stood up from the bed and searched for the guest room her family had. It wasn't hard because there were only three bedrooms and he smiled when he found it. He knocked twice before opening the door to find...

No one.

Disappointed, he returned to Maya's room where she remained in the same spot he left her in.

"Why isn't Josh here?" The phone almost fell on the floor when she heard his name.

"Josh? He's out doing the mysterious stuff he always does. Sorry, I kicked you before but Shawn told me that I couldn't tell anyone about Josh being here and I'm assuming it's a very important reason."

"But you told me." Farkle pointed out.

"I know but that was before I knew. And I won't be telling anyone else about Josh staying here."

"Not even Riley? Shouldn't she know?"

"His family are the people that we're hiding him from, Farkle. Keep up with the story. Riley is the last person I want to tell about her uncle staying with us."

Her skinny friend smirked, "Aw, does little Maya care about her husband, Joshua?" He proceeded with mature kissy faces and noises.

"He's not my husband, Farkle," She warned, "Did I tell you what he calls me?"

"No? I'm guessing it isn't wife?"

Maya slapped his arm, "He keeps calling me gorgeous. Even though I've told him to stop numerous times."

Farkle stopped and then whistled, "That guy has more game than I thought."

* * *

_Thump. Thump. Thump._

There it goes, the familiar sound of Josh being locked outside the house.

It was embarrassing how she hesitated to get up and open the window because of the cuddling incident that happened on Sunday. Even though she shouldn't be, it's not like he asked for her hand in marriage.

_Thump. Thump. Thump._

She should probably stop over-thinking things with Josh and just open the window. She threw the blankets off her body and opened the window where Josh waited with a dazzling smile.

"Good evening, gorgeous. I feel like I haven't seen you since Su-"

"Saturday. I know but you know me, I'm an early bird."

He titled his head and chuckled, "That's strange for someone who hates mornings. This doesn't have anything to do with what happened on Saturday, right?"

"Wha-What happened? It's all just a blur to me."

"You know, it's okay if you felt uncomfortable. You could just tell me." Josh looked at her like she was some fragile thing that he didn't want to break, he even stayed a safe distance away from her. She kind of felt bad for letting him think that but her actual thoughts scared her more.

Waking up next to him was actually more satisfying than she expected and her thirteen year old self was jumping for joy at the memory. Actually her seventeen year old self was happy too.

"I wasn't uncomfortable, Josh. I just had stuff to do. I'm fine." She even bravely stepped forward to take his hand which made him perk up instantly.

"Good," He intertwined their fingers, "Because the last thing I would ever want to do is hurt you, Maya. I hope you know that."

Grabbing his hand might've been a bad idea. Because now he was looking at her like she was a rare star in the night sky and it was making her nervous. She dropped her hand from his,

"So, what have you been up to?"

He laughed before moving past her and laying down on her bed, "I thought we already went over this. Besides, I want to know if anything happened with you and Riley today."

"Well, yesterday we found out that we never deleted the other's number. So, we kind of spent all of the afternoon texting and it feels kind of weird in a way. It's like no time has passed at all. What?" She asked when she noticed his lips quirk up a bit.

"Nothing, I just like seeing you happy."

Her cheeks grew warm and she muttered, "Farkle was right."

"Right about what?"

"Nothing, just...he pointed out how flirtatious you are. It must come in handy when since you go out all the time." Ugh, she sounded like a girlfriend who was trying to test her boyfriend to see if he was cheating. She should've just stopped talking.

Josh sat up and approached her, "Is that what you think I do when I leave? That I go out and flirt with other girls?" He didn't look insulted, just very curious which Maya never liked.

"You shouldn't care what I think. I'm not your girlfriend." Those four words seemed to snap Josh out of some trance because he looked incredibly confused, he actually looked a little hurt.

"No...you're not," His eyes didn't meet hers and his tall body was backing away from her and to the door, "Um, good night, Maya."

Had he thought that they were...? No, he was the one who rebuffed her advances years ago. Maybe it was because he called her 'Maya' instead of 'gorgeous' (a nickname she was just starting to grow fond of). Or maybe it was because this was the first time they talked about their relationship status, all he had done was kiss her cheek and hand, he even held it when she told him about Riley.

They never kissed, they were never together and she could feel the once playful mood of their relationship disappear just as quickly as Josh did.


	10. not the right moment

Maya refused to be pranked by Shawn again.

She proceeded into the kitchen with caution the next morning. If she saw the tiniest bit of her mother's legs or any other body part that would normally be covered up, she'd make a mad dash to her room.

When she opened her door to step out and scope the area, a mustard colored sticky note was on her door. It was sloppy handwritting and Maya guessed that it was Josh because Shawn was normally awake at this time and her mother's handwriting was impeccable.

She should know after all the times she's forged her mother's signature.

_I don't flirt with other girls when I go out..._

_I'm already interested in someone_

Her stomach plummeted, he was already interested in someone else.

There was no way Maya could compete with someone who was most likely Josh's age and not in high school. Why would he tell her that though? Did he want her to be jealous? Was he being an asshole?

She didn't know or care because she crumbled the paper and threw it in the garbage. Josh didn't need to rub it in her face that he was seeing someone, all he had to do was stop charming her and remain loyal to that lucky girl.

If only that were possible when it came to him.

* * *

"You look chipper." Farkle noted as Maya slammed the car door before the pulled away from her house.

Her eyes remained shut before she took a deep breath and looked at her best friend, "Sorry, it's just that Josh is so infuriating not to mention confusing."

"What did hubby do now?"

She scowled before continuing, "We were talking and I told him that he's really flirty and it must come in handy since he goes out all the time then suddenly he's like, 'you think i flirt with other girls when i go out' and i said, 'it doesn't matter what you do for me because it's not like i'm your girlfriend'. And he looked like he just realized we weren't a thing and just acted weird. He freakin' left me a note that said he's interested in someone already too. Why would I want to know that anyway?"

Farkle was glancing at her from the corner of his eye, smirking. He obviously failed to see the stress his best friend was going through, "You two are weird. Why don't you just kiss and get over it?"

"I do _not_ want to kiss him! Besides he's interested in someone else, not some stupid high school girl. I feel so stupid." She muttered the last part under her breath, hoping Farkle wouldn't hear how pathetic she sounded.

Of course, he did anyway and it made his playful demeanor disappear. "Hey, Maya? You're not stupid and any guy would be lucky to date you no matter what grade level you're in. I'm sure Josh knows that too, guys just don't know how to deal with emotions."

"Speaking of guys and emotions, do you know what you're going to do about your mystery girl?" Maya asked, eager to change the subject.

"So, I'm thinking of starting the interviews today. You think I'll get in trouble?"

"I know you're going to get in trouble. And I already told you to drop it. If the girl wanted to be found, she probably would've come out of hiding already." Maya sighed deeply.

"Are you saying that she doesn't want to see me?" There was panic in his voice which was something that she didn't want. Farkle deserved to find someone that made him happy.

"No," She replied quickly, "Some girls don't like to think of one night stands especially when it's with some stranger."

Farkle seemed to consider it before grinning widely, "I'll do something so romantic, it'll be impossible for her to be embarrassed."

"Don't do anything stupid please."

"What makes you think I'm going to do something stupid?"

"Because it's you." Maya laughed.

* * *

"Riley? Riley?" The blonde waved her hand in front of the hypnotized girl's face before she finally snapped out of it. Her brown lovesick eyes would travel towards the back of the room where a certain southern boy was looking at her with the same level of bliss.

"Yes? I'm sorry, were you saying something?" It was obvious Maya still didn't have Riley's attention by the way her eyes flicked from Maya's face to Lucas.

"Actually, yes. You can stare at Lucas after school, we have to answer these questions."

Riley flushed, "How did you know I was looking at Lucas?"

"Because I have eyes." She replied like it was obvious before looking at the paper with their questions, "So, who do you miss most?"

"Who's yours?" Riley said and seemed to be having difficulty keeping her eyes on the blonde in front of her.

"Well, my grandma probably. I kind of miss doing old people stuff like play Scrabble when she was here. I never get a chance to visit her at her retirement home because of how far away it is."

Riley jot it down before sighing sadly, "Well, the person I miss most would be my Uncle Josh," Maya's heart leaped into her throat.

"Why's that?"

"After he enrolled in college, he was able to visit us whenever he wanted so he came over a lot. But now, apparently he ran away. My dad has been looking for him for a week now and things have been so tense and we got a call from his coll—"

If she were going to say anymore, it was cut off by the beep of the intercom turning on. Maya expected another type of drill from the principal but instead she heard the eccentric voice of her best friend, "Is this on? Testing? Testing."

"Oh my God." Maya facepalmed and felt secondary humiliation for what Farkle was about to do.

"Is that Farkle?" asked a curious Riley. All Maya did was nod as Farkle continued, satisfied that the whole school could hear him.

"Alright fellow classmates, I'm making this announcement to ask about a girl that I met on Saturday. It was at a party and I remember it being one of the best nights of my life. Mystery girl, if you're out there, just know that Farkle Minkus aka your prince charming is waiting for you with open arms. You can call me at this number 2-Mr. Minkus, get back to class!" A voice interrupted Farkle ignorantly saying his phone number out to the public for which Maya was grateful.

The class returned to its usual buzzing of talking and gossip but all Maya could think about was how horrible Farkle's speech was. There was no possible way that she was going to reveal herself now.

"That was...romantic." Riley said uncomfortably.

"And humiliating. My best friend is an idiot."

"I'm sure the girl found it entertaining, I know I would've," Riley giggled, "But, we should get back to the assignment."

That topic really didn't put her at ease, "Right, you said you miss your Uncle Josh. Do you know why he ran away?"

Riley shook her head, "Nope, my dad said that it was a long story and I wasn't really in the mood to listen. I just know that Josh running away was kind of a big deal."

"I'm sorry."

"There's nothing to be sorry about, it's not like you're keeping him hidden away from us." It was meant to be a joke but it didn't make Maya laugh, it made her sick with the guilt she could bubbling up inside her.

* * *

She really needed to do laundry.

Her room looked like a tornado just passed through, there was no way that she would be able to distinguish the clean clothes from the dirty ones.

That was Maya Hart's dilemma at eight o'clock at night, she couldn't find her pajamas.

_Thump. Thump. Thump._

Oh hell no. No, no, no.

She wasn't even dressed and he was knocking on her window. And after the awkward thing yesterday, you would think the boy would want to some alone time and bring his keys when he left.

Hurriedly, she found some sweats and a baggy t-shirt and ran to open the window.

Josh's dark eyes analyzed her face before they dropped to Maya's shirt. His head hit the top of her window with a bang and he winced. He continued to climb in through the window, holding his head and groaning.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I just got distracted." He dared to steal a glance at her shirt once more as it let her pale bare shoulders peek out.

"Distracted by what?"

It was probably the first time she's ever seen him blush and damn...it was adorable, "Your-uh shirt, Maya."

"My what?" Only when she looked down did she realize what had distracted him. The neckline of the shirt she had thrown on was large and didn't leave much to the imagination. Her arms immediately wrapped around her chest area, and her cheeks were burning with embarrassment.

"It was an accident, I swear. I didn't mean to look."

Even with his apology, Maya couldn't bare to look at him without feeling exposed, "Do you-uh need an ice pack or something?"

"If you don't mind."

Maya darted out of her room, thankful to be away from his intimidating eyes.

When she returned, she found Josh still standing around awkwardly and was slightly happy that she wasn't the only one that felt uncomfortable with everything. "You should probably be sitting. You hit your head pretty hard, you should relax."

He followed her instruction and sat on the bed while Maya set the ice wrapped in two layers of paper towel down beside him so she could find something to cover herself with. Something that resembled a hoodie was laying in front of her wardrobe, so she quickly threw it on before going to her bed where Josh was delicately tapping the ice against his head.

"Is that helping at all?" Maya asked though she knew the answer.

"Slowly but surely."

She rolled her eyes before sitting down beside him on the bed and taking the make-shift ice pack and pressing it against the side of his head, "You are such a baby. If you don't apply the ice right, it won't get better."

He hissed in pain before whispering, "I am sorry, you know."

"I know, Josh. You apologized when you came in."

"No," He looked determined and stern (a new look on him), "I'm not talking about your shirt anymore, I'm talking about last night. It was weird and I'm sorry if I crossed a line-"

"You didn't do anything, Josh," He was still frowning so she offered him a small smile, "Honest. I'm just confused as to what we are."

His eyes connected with hers and she suddenly realized how close they were getting. Her arm wasn't as extended to keep the ice against Josh's head and their fingers were slowly moving forward towards each other.

"I think," His eyes fell to her lips as he moved closer, "that you and I are..." Her eyes were closed now and her lips were waiting. Her heart was thumping like crazy and she couldn't stop her hands from shaking. She could feel his breath on her nose and it smelled weird (was it alcohol?) and then the ghost of his lips.

She pulled away slightly, before going forward to meet his welcoming lips.

The window slammed shut suddenly and made the two of them jump apart.

Damn the wind, Maya thought grumpily.

Josh rose from the bed before falling back down on the bed, "Josh!" Maya said, alarmed.

"Gorgeous? My head hurts." He whined.

"I know, Josh. I need you to come closer to me so I can put ice on it."

He shook his head, "I can't. I might do something bad."

"What are you going to do that's so bad?" She came closer to him despite his protests holding tightly to the paper towels.

"I might try to kiss you again." He whispered.

"And what's so bad about that?" Maya found herself whispering back. It was horrible of her to want him, she knew that. Josh was interested in another girl and here she was waiting for him to kiss her. She was leaning over him now and his eyes were starting to shut. Before he fell asleep though, he said,

"Not the right moment."


	11. today you're all mine

Everything around her shouted that it was all a dream.

Josh was gone in the morning before she woke up along with the make-shift ice pack. The end of her bed didn't look wrinkled like someone had slept there, it looked quite neat actually.

The only thing that reminded her of what happened was the old hoodie she had put on over her revealing t-shirt.

And that meant it was real.

She had almost kissed Josh.

Maya wasn't even sure if their lips had actually touched but hers tingled like he had kissed her repeatedly.

It was almost shameful how much she wanted that to be true.

[*]

After getting dressed, she made her way to the kitchen where Shawn waited, alone.

Her coffee and sandwich were in the middle of the table like usual and it felt nice having some things stay the same. Shawn looked up from his phone and smiled at his stepdaughter before returning to typing away furiously.

"Busy with work?" She asked conversationally before sipping her coffee.

"Yeah, I have a ton of requests for pictures but I don't want to leave Josh here without me to cover for him."

"Are you ever going to tell me why he ran away? Riley told me about him being missing and that they're all looking for him."

Immediately he stopped typing and averted his attention to Maya, "You told me that you and Riley don't talk anymore."

"We didn't before last week and now I'm lying to her-"

"Look kiddo, there's a lot you don't know about this whole thing and I don't think you'll ever be ready to know."

"Why the hell not?!" She shouted. The secrets were getting annoying now and it was becoming ridiculous how everyone was treating her like a little kid.

"Because it's doesn't concern you right now. All that should matter now is making sure that no one finds out he's here, if you care about Josh at all then it shouldn't matter if you know the reason why."

She really did care about him, more than she'd ever say out loud at seventeen but she did. "It's really that bad, huh?"

"It's really complicated, is what is." said Shawn who brought a hand through his messy chocolate locks and pulled on them.

* * *

"You know, I forgot to congratulate you on you're little stunt yesterday. I was too busy freaking out about Riley telling me about Josh. How much trouble are you in with your dad?"

Farkle spared her a side glance before looking back at the road, "Well, he thought it was right and just that I try to look for my true love while my mom was wondering what I was doing out of class."

"How did you manage to get past everyone in the main office?"

"A master never reveals his secrets."

Maya chuckled, "Fine, what did Isadora think about your profession of love for the mystery girl? Was there no fresh flowers waiting for you eighth period?"

The smirk that had been on his lips faltered, "Actually, Isadora didn't say much of anything yesterday. I didn't even know she was there until my teacher was calling attendance. She's been like that all week."

"What did you do?" Maya loved Farkle to death but sometimes he could be a complete idiot when it came to Isadora. Sure, the girl had a weird obsession with him but hurting someone wasn't the right way to do things and her opinion on that reflected in her aggressive voice.

"Nothing! I swear, she started acting like that on Monday as far as I know. And it probably has nothing to do with me because all I talked about was the girl from the party. She shouldn't be mad about me talking about other girls because I wouldn't shut up about you and Riley in middle school because I was practically in love with you two."

"Practically?" She asked with amusement.

He rolled his eyes, "You know what I mean. Maybe her being sad has nothing to do with me at all."

"You should talk to her about it."

Maya has never seen Farkle's eyes widen so quickly, "Why me? You're the one that's worried about her!"

"Well, I'm no good with talking about feelings. I told the guy I like that I didn't care if he flirted with other girls."

"So, you admit you like him?" Farkle wiggled his eyebrows suggestively and was lucky that he was behind the wheel or Maya would've slapped him upside the head.

"No, this isn't about me and Josh. This is about you talking to Isadora and finding out what's wrong with her, school days without her obsessing over you are starting to get boring."

* * *

Pre-Calculus was probably the most boring subject ever.

Who cared about all these letters and fractions anyway? Would these actually help her pay taxes? Would they pay her bills?

The answer was no and everyone in the whole class knew that the information was useless.

That is the only reason that Maya fell asleep and she refused to believe that she would get sent to the principal's office for snoozing in class.

Yet, her stomach plummeted to the ground at the sound of name on the school's intercom,

"Maya Hart, please report to the main office. Thank you."

There was apparently an audience with her because people 'oohed' like she was being summoned to court. Ms. Bronco (old woman with the most dull and draining voice ever) signed a pass for her to take before she left the classroom.

On the way there, Maya was listing all the possible things that could've led to her going to the principal. She was humbly surprised to realize that she hasn't done anything bad recently.

Maybe she's getting an award...

Ha, that'd be rich.

She walked into the main office to find a tall man wearing a brown suede jacket that looked similar to Shawn's, dark blue jeans and black slicked back hair.

"Oh, Ms. Hart! Your uncle is here to pick you up for your doctor's appointment." The secretary said and when her 'uncle' turned around, she almost choked on her saliva.

The well dressed man was Josh.

Josh, the person who is supposed to be laying low...

"Hello there, sweetheart. We better get going, we don't want to be late." He said in a terrible British accent.

"You're absolutely incredible, you know that?" She said in disbelief. There was a pen in his hand which she assumed he used to sign her out of school.

"Oh stop it Maya. You're too kind, now come on."

Her baby blue eyes scanned everyone in the office to see if they could sense the bullshit. It seemed everyone was a complete idiot today because Josh did not look remotely similar to her at all.

Not to mention they didn't even ask what doctor she was apparently going to.

Maya left the school annoyed with a smiling Joshua on her trail.

"Well? Are you going to say anything?" His long legs brought him to her in no time as he led them to her mother's old pale yellow beetle.

"Yeah," Maya turned her face to glare, "The only person that is going to see the doctor is you after I kick your ass. What the hell do you think you're doing taking me out of school?"

The jerk had the audacity to open the passenger door for her too. Damn it, she was trying to be mad at him.

"Look, I took you out of school because I wanted to apologize. I drank way too much last night and I don't remember much of what I did. I just know that I woke up in your bed with no memory of how I got there. I didn't do anything stupid, right?"

If an attempt to kiss her was stupid then the answer is yes. But Maya couldn't bring herself to talk about it now that she knew he was drunk.

It stung to think that the only reason he would kiss her was because he was drunk.

Though she should've realized this because he already told her that he was interested in someone. She should probably just learn to live with rejection.

"No, you just slurred a whole bunch of nonsense about the universe and fell asleep on my bed. Typical drunk." said Maya and she wanted it to sound truthful. She wanted it to sound like he was such a burden to have in her room and that the memory of what happened didn't make her giddy.

And he believed it, "Good. Because I don't want to ruin this."

"Ruin what?"

"Our friendship. You really mean a lot to me, Maya." Josh beamed at her as they drove through the city and Maya internally groaned.

* * *

Farkle and Riley were texting her nonstop.

Riley kept asking her where she was and why she didn't show up for class. The question about watching Air Buds with Shawn came up again and it worried Maya how many times he's pulled her out of school to watch that movie with him.

And Farkle kept asking because his nosy behind wanted to know where she went too. He also spoke about how he tried to talk to Isadora which he said was a bad idea from the start. Apparently, Isadora wasn't talking to Farkle anymore.

Something was definitely wrong with her.

The girl had planned her and Farkle's wedding since eighth grade, her attention to detail was slightly unnerving, and now she was just giving up.

Was it because of all the stuff Farkle kept saying about that mystery girl that he was supposedly in love with? Was Isadora heartbroken?

The reason she couldn't further verify anything was because the moment that Josh saw that Maya had her phone, he took it and put it in his back pocket.

"Are you being serious? Give me back my phone." Maya said after he snatched it from her hands.

But he shook his head, his lips threatening to reveal his cheeky grin, "Why? So, you can gossip with Farkle?"

She gaped, "I do _not_ gossip with Farkle. We were having an actual discussion about...stuff."

"Right. Well, Farkle is going to have to wait until you're back in your room to talk to you because today you're all mine." He said with the boyish smile she had come to love.

Wait, love?!

No, that was just her brain being weird because of what Josh was saying. Her heart fluttered at what he said, "you're all mine."

Yeah, she was screwed.

And to make it worse, Josh had brought her to an art museum and she didn't think much of his actions until she caught him staring at her.

"Do I have something on my face?" Maya asked as the two stood in front of a painting of a sunset on a prairie. She thought it was exquisite.

"No," He scratched his neck nervously, "I just...do you like any of this stuff?"

"Of course I do. It's really nice, why?"

"I tried looking up the best art museums to go to and this was one of them and I just didn't...I know you like art so-"

Maya smiled, "You remember that I like art?"

"Well, you did kind of draw me a heart with our initials in them when we were younger."

Her cheeks grew warm at the mention of it. And she threw her hands over her face to cover her red cheeks that she was sure Josh saw because he started laughing.

"It was cute." He whispered to her and pulled one of her hands away.

"It was embarrassing, I was like an obsessed fangirl. How could you even want to talk to me after seeing how much I liked you?" Maya opened one eye to his reaction and her stomach flipped at the soft smile on his lips.

"Maybe I liked you back."

She laughed dryly, "Yeah, okay." Now she had his pity. Great.

"I'm being serious."

"Fine, if you supposedly liked me back, then why did you so you were too old for me? Why didn't you date me?" Yes, she did sound bitter and desperate.

Josh sighed, "Because things were too complicated back then. It wouldn't have worked out. And I was too old for you."

"But they could work out now." She blurt out and mentally cringed, "I mean what changed?"

Finally he relaxed and his eyes focused back on the blonde beside him, "I didn't date you because it wasn't the right moment."

She stilled at that. The previous night came to mind and she began to wonder if he had been serious.

There was going to be a right moment to kiss him? To date him?

There couldn't be. Josh had told her that there was a girl already and she shouldn't be messing around with relationships. But she was still...

"I guess there never will be. But there's still hope for the girl you're interested in, right?"

His face instantly lit up at the mention of her and she tried to ignore the jealous ache in her heart.

"I don't know. The girl I'm interested in is...amazing. Whenever I look or think about her, I'm happy. She's the only happy thing in my life right now." If hearing about another girl wasn't enough, Josh made sure to keep eye contact with her the whole time. And to top it off, he basically just said that their 'friendship' wasn't even a happy thing in his life.

Apparently, some girl from nowhere can make him happy. That's probably where he goes everyday. He probably walked with her all over the city—

"Are you okay, Maya?" He asked suddenly.

"Yeah, why?"

"Because you look like you want to kill someone. Is there something bothering you?"

_Yes! You have a huge crush on some mystery girl, we're apparently just friends after you tried to kiss me, you sneak out in the middle of the night to go to God knows where and you stopped calling me gorgeous!_

But there was no way in hell that Maya would say that aloud so she plastered a fake smile on her face and shook her head like she'd done something silly,"Sorry, I was just deep in thought."

And they moved on to the next painting.


	12. tell us something we don't know

Maya remembered yesterday.

She remembered Josh pulling her out of school and she remembered the two of them sneaking into the house while the lights were out and she also remembered Josh kissing her cheek before whispering, "Good night, Maya."

Again, he didn't call her gorgeous. And she hated how much it bothered her.

The morning after though was made for interrogation.

"Sleep well, kiddo?" Shawn asked while reading the paper. He never does that.

She scratched her head before reaching for the brown paper bag on the table which was quickly snatched from her reach, "Hey!"

"I buy breakfast for kids who go to school. Not kids who get their friends to take them for a day in the city." He still hadn't looked up at her. Maya was worried that she actually upset him until she heard footsteps retreat and disappear. The source of the footsteps were behind the door to the master bedroom and it was then that Maya could see a ghost of a smile on Shawn's lips.

"That wasn't funny! I thought you were actually mad at me." Maya grabbed the bag from his chuckling form.

"Yeah, your mom was the one who was mad. Her car wasn't in its usual parking space at the end of the street and she thought that she got robbed. I told her that you told Josh to pick you up."

"But Josh picked me up without asking. And I didn't even—"

Shawn held up his hand to stop her talking, "I only told her that because if I told her the truth she'd be even more upset. Plus, I volunteered to 'lecture' you so that she could sleep in."

"Oh," She answered surprised, "So, what's the real reason Josh came to pick me up?"

"Josh said that he needed to talk to you immediately so I gave him the keys to your mom's car." He said simply.

"You didn't even want to know the reason why he needed to see me during school?"

Shawn got up and put his paper down, "No. I didn't need to be involved in all your teen drama."

* * *

Something was definitely up.

Farkle wasn't as chatty as he usually was. In fact, he kept silent most of the time. It weirded Maya out so much that she forgot to ask him about Isadora.

He didn't show up at lunch either along with Isadora so Maya ate by herself and contemplated why he was being so weird. Farkle would probably explain himself by the end of the day so Maya waited and as she was answering questions with Riley, it seemed that his weird behavior had spread.

"Psst, Maya." Riley's brown eyes darted around the room, looking for an eavesdroppers.

"What?"

"I text everyone. BYOB, we're all still heading to Farkle's, right?"

It was like she was speaking in code and Maya understood none of it, "Huh?"

"Tonight, Farkle's." Riley repeated, still being secretive.

"Um, yeah. Sure, at Farkle's." Maya still had no idea what Riley was talking about but everyone was doing weird shit that day so why would Riley be an exception.

They continued to work until the bell rang then Riley got her stuff and smiled at Maya before following Lucas and Missy out the door.

[*]

"Hey, how was your day?" asked Farkle, seemingly normal.

"Fine, where were you at lunch?"

He stiffened, "Oh, I was doing some work for Mr. Compen. He needed another opinion on the math homework and...stuff." There was no need to look into his story because Maya knew he was lying.

"Really? That's the best you could come up with?" She crossed her arms and smirked. Farkle gripped the steering wheel tighter and kept his eyes forward.

"It's the truth. But, we don't need to elaborate on that. How about we go eat something so then I can properly tell you about Isadora and how she suddenly doesn't like me anymore."

That got Maya's attention off his lie, "No way! Now, I know there's something wrong with her."

The pair of them went to Chipotle which was unusually crowded though Farkle didn't seem to mind. He actually seemed relieved when he found a long line.

After stuffing their face, Farkle began his tale about Isadora, "I talked to her yesterday at lunch like you asked. She was headed out of the building, so I know that she wasn't even going to attempt to sit with me. She looked like she'd been crying so I tried asking what was wrong. But Isadora kept walking. I had to literally put myself in her way so that she couldn't leave and you know what she said? She told me to leave her the hell alone."

Maya gaped, "Damn. I didn't know that girl had backbone, I wonder what you did to piss her off."

"I didn't do anything! The girl is literally screwing with me. I never cared what she did before. In fact, I actually thought she was pretty annoying. But the look that she gave me...I've never seen her that upset. I just wish I knew what was bothering her."

"You almost sound like you care about her, Farkle. Is your one night stand with your mystery girl not enough anymore." She teased and Farkle sputtered.

"N-No. Absolutely not. No way, I would never ever date Isadora."

Maya chuckled, "Whatever you say. I just think you two would have the smartest little babies in all of New York."

He glared at her before taking a large bite out of his burrito.

The sun was setting while Farkle drived them around and the two of them talked. Maya had told him about what Josh did and instead of saying that they're married, he said,

"Josh is really clever. What a good guy."

"I guess. I mean, if you don't count the fact that he keeps leading me on while he likes someone else and that he almost kissed me."

Farkle began to look uncomfortable as they neared their neighborhood, "Hey, you wanna come over?"

"Sure, I have nothing better to do." She shrugged.

"Great." Farkle continued to drive, looking a bit more at ease until they pulled up to Farkle's house. His extravagant brick mansion looked lit up with voices streaming out the open windows and music disturbing the otherwise peaceful street. Maya looked closer and saw people's dancing silhouettes inside and she felt officially confused.

Her cerulean eyes flew to Farkle who appeared to be trying to make himself as small as possible.

"Since when were you having a party?"

"It wasn't my idea to have the party." Farkle said softly.

Maya rolled her eyes, "Then who's idea was it?"

He looked reluctant to answer her but blurt out, "Josh's."

[*]

Maya never stormed into a place so quick. People blocked her path but she didn't seem to care. Her small legs weaved through the crowds of people as she scoped out the area.

If the idiot even had a brain, he wouldn't be here.

She spotted a familiar tuft of ebony hair and sighed before walking over to him. It seemed that Josh's brain wasn't in full function that night. Angrily, she tapped his shoulder and he turned around and grinned at the sight of her.

"Are you an idiot?" She shouted over the music.

"Hello to you too." He shouted back, bemused.

"You truly are incredible," Maya glared at him, "My parents put their ass on the line and lie to their friends about you so that you can go and throw a stupid party? How the hell did you even get people over here?"

Josh reached into his back pocket and pulled out her phone. He gave it to her while she was seething, "I'm sorry for using it without permission but it's just a party, Maya. There's no reason to be mad at me, I'm just having fun."

She laughed dryly, "Fun? You think that exposing yourself and making us all look like liars is fun? I've been lying to Riley for you. And the worst part is, I don't even know the reason you're hiding from your family. I've been keeping your secret because I freaking care about you. You could've committed a crime or something but I wouldn't know because you never told me. So, if you want to get caught, be my guest. Just don't expect me to back you up."

Maya turned to walk away from him, her phone clutched tightly in her hand until he grabbed her wrist, "Maya, wait. I'm sorry." The panic in his voice made her stop but only for a moment.

"Let me go, Josh." She said in a calmer tone than before.

"I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking—"

She turned to look at him and his crestfallen face and tried to stay mad, "You're right, you weren't thinking because if you had then you would've realized that I was willing to lie to everyone in order to protect you. Shawn was willing to lie to his best friend to protect you. But you could obviously care less when you're throwing a huge party like this. Now let me go."

His grip loosened and she pulled her arm back, Maya turned and didn't look back. One part of her wanted to hug the part of him she knew she hurt but she wanted to also slap him for throwing the party.

Because there was no other reason for her to stay, Maya looked for Farkle so that he could take her home.

Instead she ran into Riley and nearly had a heart attack.

"Maya! I'm glad I ran into you, you have to talk to Isadora." Before Maya could speed ahead and leave the party, Riley grabbed her wrist and led her up the bright wooden staircase.

She really didn't want to talk to Isadora. The first reason being that she didn't want to be at the party anymore than she had to. The second reason was that Maya didn't really like having a deep heart to heart with people because she felt like she couldn't really help them.

In the end, Maya was still dragged upstairs and thrown into a dark room where she can hear muffled sobs.

There was a bed, she discovered by following the noise. And she sat on it while Riley took a seat on the floor beside them.

"Isadora, why are you crying?" Maya inquired softly. Her eyes adjusted just enough to make out her soft silhouette. Isadora sat up from her crouched over position and wiped her eyes.

"I couldn't do it. I couldn't tell him." She cried. Did she miss something?

"Tell who what?"

"T-Tell F-Farkle." She hiccuped and Maya was worried that he did something to her. Almost.

"Are you going to tell him off again? Because it was almost as entertaining as you fawning over him." Maya laughed shortly hoping to cheer her up. It didn't work.

Isadora shook her head and Maya noticed that her hair was loose.

"I don't need to do that. I need to tell Farkle about the girl from last Saturday."

The blonde leaned closer, more interested in what Isadora had to say now, "You know who the girl is?!"

She nodded, "It's me."

"What?" Riley said in a clear tone of disbelief.

"I was the one who slept with Farkle." Isadora said. What was even weirder about hearing her admit it was hearing the disgust in her voice as she did.

"But I thought you liked Farkle. Shouldn't your life be complete now?"

"I've never felt worse actually." She breathed. So, she was actually over Farkle?

"Was he that bad in bed?" Riley asked cautiously.

"No," Isadora answered quickly, "I just thought that when Farkle and I...had sex, it would be sort of special. Not some stupid drunken one night stand."

"He's in love with you though, Isadora." Maya tried but was shut down again.

Isadora took a shaky breath before continuing, "He's not in love with me. He's in love with a girl he slept with and it could've been any girl, he could've been in love with any girl. The girl from the party just so happened to be me. And when he finds out that it was me, his 'love' will disappear. I wanted Farkle to fall in love with me for me not because of sex."

"I'm so sorry, Isadora. But I think Farkle is more complex than you think. You should tell him." Maya said while she heard Riley get up.

"Maybe someday when I'm not in the mood for rejection."

Riley turned on the light and it was then that Maya saw the broken girl beside her. Her knees were pulled to her chest and her long black hair was now a curtain to shield what Maya assumed was her ter stained face.

"Riley, what are you doing?" Maya asked as she tried to block the bright light with her hand.

"Isadora trusts us enough to tell us her biggest secret, so I think we should tell her ours."

Not gonna happen.

"I don't have any secrets to tell." Maya lied to their face. Isadora didn't seem to care if she shared a secret or not but Riley looked like she saw right through her.

"I think that's a load of crap but I'll go first so you have time to think of one," She smirked before continuing, "My secret is that I'm in love with Lucas."

"Tell us something we don't know." Isadora said wryly. Riley gaped and looked from the sad brunette to the blonde beside her who was nodding in agreement.

"You guys knew already?"

Maya rose from the bed hoping that Isadora's sassiness would make Riley forget about making everyone tell a secret.

"Riley, everyone knew. I'll see you guys later." Maya put a comforting hand on her shoulder before opening the door and letting the deafening EDM music inside.

Thankfully, Riley didn't follow her and she decided that she would just take a cab home, she had some change from Chipotle anyway.

On her way downstairs, she made the mistake of looking in the direction where she had left Josh and saw him whispering something into a girl's ear that made her laugh. He continued to remain in close proximity and Maya scoffed before leaving.

Maybe that was his mystery girl.

If only she had known that Josh had only just started responding to that girl who had been flirting with him all night so he could get a rise out of Maya.

If only she knew that he felt immensely guilty for trying to make her jealous but only hurting her in the end.

If only she knew that her words had hurt him too.


	13. saints don't lie

To say that Maya avoided Josh was an understatement.

Anytime he was in the house, she would make sure she wasn't. And if he wasn't in the house she would try to do all the stuff she needed to like homework and laundry so that when he returned she could be gone for an extended period of time.

Maya would go running or walking possibly even go out to eat. She even spent time with Farkle who told her how Josh text him from her phone and asked if they could have a party at his house.

She didn't care about him keeping the secret from her. She was just mad at Josh for flirting which angered her more because she shouldn't care who he flirts with. _She_ was the one who told _him_ that they weren't together so he could do whatever he wants.

Her jealousy was stupid and unnecessary and all she could wish for was the image of Josh and that girl erased from her brain.

* * *

"So, you still looking for your mystery girl?" Maya asked as Farkle spaced out during lunch.

He shook his head and focused his eyes on his best friend, "Oh, yeah." He answered weakly.

"You okay?"

"Yeah, I just," His eyes glanced at Isadora's usual seat that was now empty, "How long do you think she's going to avoid me?"

"Are we talking about Isadora now?"

Farkle nodded, "The damn girl is messing with my head. For years, I couldn't stand her massive crush on me. All that time, I wished she would stop and treat me normally but it never happened. And now, she can't stand the sight of me and I should be glad but I'm not."

"You sound like you miss her." Maya smirked at her attempt to tease him but he didn't look like he was going to get defensive. He just looked...sad.

"I guess I do," Farkle laughed dryly, "Ironic, huh?"

"No," Maya shook her head, "But I do think you should tell her."

He raised his eyebrows in surprise, "Tell her I miss her? So then she can punch me in the face? No thanks, this is the money maker."

Maya chuckled, "I don't think she hates you, Farkle. I think she's still in love with you actually." Yes, she was completely meddling in Farkle's love life but in the end he would be happy so it wasn't so bad, right?

"Oh really? You can read minds now because I'm pretty sure that Isadora wouldn't tell you that."

"Just trust me on this. She doesn't hate you just try talking to her nicely. And definitely tell her you missed her." She squeezed his hand reassuringly before taking another bite of her PB&J.

* * *

Waiting for Pre-Calculus was like waiting for death. Every second ticked by and it made Maya anxious. She hated not knowing something about a subject and math was definitely one of those things she'd never understand through time.

And she didn't have Josh to come pretend to be a long lost family member again (not that she would want him too, he was an asshole).

Maya reluctantly pulled her hundred pound textbook out of her and Farkle's locker and shut it only to jump in shock and nearly drop the book. Leaning on the other side of her locker was Missy Bradford.

With a perky smile on her face, she began to slowly clap, "Maya Hart, look at you. Making up with Riley after all this time, helping that dork, Farkle find his dream girl. What can't you do?"

"Huh?" She had to admit that Missy's smile was starting to scare her and she was completely confused as to what Missy was doing at her locker. Judging by the emptiness in the hallway, the bell already rang and Maya's pre-calculus teacher was probably going to go ballistic when she walked in.

"You've practically been the definition of a saint lately," And then her smile simmered down to a no good smirk, "Except saints don't lie."

Maya sighed as she stepped away from the locker and tried to go to her class, "I have no idea what you're talking about." But Missy blocked her path, even when she tried to side step her.

"I think you do. You are the one keeping all the secrets after all."

"What secrets?" Maya almost yelled. The damn riddles were starting to irritate her.

Then Missy's smile fell and her face looked innocent, if only her intentions matched, "Only the secret about Joshua Matthews, Riley's super hot uncle who ran away to God knows where. No one seems to be able to find him, but you can."

Hearing his name from Missy's lips made her blood run cold, "I have no idea what you're talking about. He's been missing for a while, what makes you think _I_ know where he is?" She tried to keep her voice leveled and tried stepping around Missy one more time. This time she didn't try to stop her, at least not physically.

"He is staying at your house, isn't he?" Her words stopped Maya dead in her tracks. The textbook almost slipped from her grasp.

Maya dropped her head, knowing now that she couldn't leave while Missy knew all this. "Judging by your reaction, I guess my theory was right," Missy laughed, "There's so much more to that blonde head of yours, huh?"

"Go to hell." She spat. Maya turned to face Missy just as she was pulling out her phone.

"Ouch, I don't think you should be rude to someone who has physical evidence of you with Josh." A picture flashed on her screen and Maya stepped closer to see that it was her and Josh at the party. He was grabbing her wrist and they were too close to be considered acquaintances. And he was at Farkle's house, there was only one way he would be able to contact Farkle and it was through Maya.

"What do you want?" She asked coldly.

"What makes you think I want something?"

"Because you are the last person to give me a lecture on morals. So, what do you want?"

She giggled, "I guess so. You're right I do want something and _you_ are the perfect person to give me what I want."

"You want money or something—"

"Please, don't offer something you clearly don't have. Besides, I don't need nor want money, I want Lucas." The way she was speaking down to her made Maya dig her nails into the textbook to keep from slapping her.

"I think you're going to have a tough time having him when he's obviously in love with—"

"Riley, I know," She finished bitterly, "I'm not blind but I always get what I want."

Maya rolled her eyes, "So, how am I supposed to get Lucas for you? I can't work miracles."

"Easy, you just separate Lucas and Riley. Tell her a lie about me and Lucas, you seem to be good at that."

"No," She said instantly, "You want me to ruin something that makes Riley happy and I'm not going to do that."

"Well, aren't you so noble? I don't care about what makes Riley happy. I care about what makes Missy happy and if you don't make me happy, I'll show Riley how much of a liar you are. Do you think she'll be happy then?"

Both choices were horrible. Both ways Riley wouldn't be happy except one way, Riley wouldn't be mad at her. But one choice wasn't selfish and if there was thing that she wasn't going to be with Riley was selfish.

"I think Riley is a strong person and I'm basically screwing myself over right now because she'll hate me in the long run. But I'm not going to hurt someone I care about, at least not the way you want me to. You're getting some sort of high off hurting people and it's sickening and I refuse to be a part of it. So go ahead, tell her. I know Riley won't be happy and neither will I but the only person I pity in this situation is you and the miserable life that you must living to even think hurting a girl that is supposedly your friend, is a way to happiness."

Missy remained silent and her prideful expression disappeared, Maya took that as her sign to leave and felt sort of proud of herself for not only sticking up for herself but for Riley too.


	14. you're not my girlfriend, remember?

Nothing could've warned Maya of the events that were about to occur. The day started off like any other after all.

At first she woke up and had her usual breakfast with Shawn.

Shawn had a big smile on his face when she sat down, "What's wrong with you?"

"Oh, I just found some old pictures of all of us. Wedding pictures, actually."

"Ah, that was a day. You were sweating like crazy and my mom's dress didn't fit." Maya remembered with a laugh.

Shawn shook his head and laughed too, "I think that's why you were so happy when we were taking the wedding pictures. You thought the whole thing was hilarious."

The two sat, perfectly content with reminiscing about the disaster wedding that took place two years prior. Suddenly Shawn reached over and placed his hand gently over Maya's, "You know your mom and I love you, right?"

"Yes, don't tell me the wedding pictures are making you sappy."

"No, I just thought about what you said last week and couldn't help but feel like you think the opposite."

Maya smiled softly, "What I said about my mom last week was just me trying to get you to drop it. My mom works all the time because she wants better for me and she was the one who stayed. I love her and I love you for being there when she couldn't."

He squeezed her hand, "I always will be."

"I know, now can we stop? All this sweetness is making me sick." Maya pulled her hand back as Shawn fell back into his chair.

A breathy chuckle escaped his lips, "Sure. You have to go to school anyway, if you miss another day your mom might kill me."

* * *

Then she had her usual morning talk with Farkle. Nothing seemed off about that either.

"So, I have a plan to set on how I'm going to get Isadora to go back to normal."

"You gonna kiss her?"

Farkle's face never turned such a deep shade of red, "N-No! Why would you say that?"

"I was kidding." Maya laughed and grew happy at her friend's reaction to her suggestion. If he kept up with this, Maya could see him and Isadora dating in the future.

"You're so funny," Farkle scowled as he took a deep breath and loosened his grip on the steering wheel, "Anyway, since she keeps avoiding me at school, I figured that if I went to her house, there's no way she could avoid me there. She'll have to talk to me."

"You should probably bring her flowers too." She suggested and his jaw tightened.

"I'll pull over and let you walk to school. Then you can tell random strangers about all your little romantic ideas."

Maya bit her lip to control her giggles, "Alright alright, I'll stop."

"Thank you."

The two stayed silent until something popped into Maya's mind and she thought it was too good to keep to herself, "So, did you buy a new turtleneck to go to see your one true love?"

"Maya!"

"What? Can't I comment on your new clothes? They look too nice to be worn to school."

"You're walking to school tomorrow." He said and she threw her head back in laughter.

* * *

All her classes dragged on and lunch was fun because Maya got another opportunity to tease Farkle about Isadora. Maya could've sworn she saw the bespectacled girl make a mad dash for the exit to the school when the lunch bell rang.

The bell rang to signal that lunch was over and Maya reluctantly got out of her seat to throw away her trash. She then made her way to the locker she shared with Farkle after the two said their goodbyes.

Even then, she didn't see anything different.

But she was wrong.

"Maya." A shaky voice said from behind her locker door. The voice was easily recognizable but the tone wasn't. Maya closed her locker after grabbing her notebook for her next class and froze as she saw Riley.

In her shaking hand was the picture that Missy had shown her the previous day and Riley looked like she was on the verge of tears. The bitch had actually told her.

"Riley-"

"Tell me she's lying." She said softly.

"Riley-"

"Tell me that this picture is fake. Tell me that Missy photoshopped it and is just playing some sick prank on me. Tell me that you didn't talk to Josh, tell me he's not staying with you." She rambled as a tear hit her cheek.

"I can't do that, Riley." Maya said lowly.

"Why not?"

Maya took a deep breath, "Because Missy was telling the truth.."

"But you didn't—how could you just? I thought you were my friend." Riley said shakily.

"I am your friend." Maya tried offering her a smile but all she could do was grimace.

Riley shook her head, "No, you're not. You lied to me, you lied right to my face and I trusted you."

"I wanted to tell you, you don't know how badly I wanted to tell you." Her voice sounded desperate and hurt and it was because Riley had a betrayed look on her face.

"But you didn't. You kept lying and breaking my trust." She was backing away from her and a tear ran down her cheek.

"Riley, don't—" A feeling of panic rose from her stomach, the same feeling she had freshman year when her and Riley fought.

"Just-Just save it, Maya. I've heard enough."

To Maya, nothing was worth fighting with Riley. Nothing was worth hurting her and seeing the look on Riley's face made her wonder if she would do everything the same way if she knew that she would end up hurting Riley in the end.

* * *

Riley didn't show up to English which was to be expected. Missy kept smirking at her and it took all of Maya's self control to keep from punching her. The day seemed to drag on as the hurt look on Riley's face stayed stuck in her mind.

Farkle had text her that he couldn't give her a ride home because he was going over to Isadora's and Maya thought it was better that way. If he knew then he would she wouldn't hear the end of how Riley was a bad friend and didn't even care to listen to Maya's reason for not telling her the truth.

All Maya wanted to do was go to her room and wallow in her misery.

[*]

Once she got home, she headed straight to her room after finding the house empty. She slammed the door and ran her hands over her face and threw her hair before screaming. All the frustration and anger that had built up until this point was released when she threw the items on her nightstand to the floor: her lamp and sketch book.

Then she threw the blankets and pillows off her bed before falling face first onto her mattress and crying.

[*]

_Thump. Thump. Thump._

There was no way in hell that she was getting up to open the window. There was no way in hell that she wanted to do anything that involved helping Josh right now.

_Thump. Thump. Thump._

Damn it, she threw the pillows on the floor so she couldn't even cover her ears.

"Maya, open up. Maya." Josh called from her fire escape.

_Thump. Thump. Thump._

Finally, she got up but didn't open the window, instead she pressed her middle finger to the window and stuck her tongue out. Then proceeded to close the blinds.

"C'mon, Maya. Open the window and you can tell me what's wrong."

She shook her head even though he couldn't see her and said, "I don't want to talk to you."

"Well, you have to talk to someone, right? Open the window, Maya, the wind is starting to pick up."

She still refused until he started to sing, "Maya, oh Maya please open the window. I'm gonna get a cold if you leave me out here."

Maya opened the window and retreated to her bed, "You deserve to get a cold."

"Ouch," He held his heart and climbed in to see the mess that Maya made, "Care to tell me what storm passed through your room?"

"It's all your fault." Maya muttered under her breath.

"What? I didn't make a mess in your room?"

"No, but you're the reason for it. You're the reason that Riley hates me, you're the reason that I had a terrible weekend, you're the reason that I'm all screwed up." She spat and Josh looked taken back.

"Riley found out that I was staying with you." He said as more of a statement than a question.

Maya scoffed, "Riley found out that I lied for you."

He cautiously made his way over to where she sat staring at the floor, "I'm so sorry that you—"

"Don't."

"Alright well that's one reason. So, how exactly did I ruin your weekend? I barely saw you."

"You threw that damn party and I saw you with...nevermind." She stopped herself before she said something stupid like she saw him flirting with some bimbo from the party and it bothered her.

"No no no. You brought it up. You saw me what at the party? Drink?" Josh didn't sound as playful as he did when he came in, he actually sounded a little offended.

"No, I just saw you...with a girl."

"_That's_ how I ruined your weekend, I was talking to a girl?" He repeated what she said like he still couldn't understand her reason for being upset.

"I saw you flirting with her." Maya clarified but it did nothing.

Josh lifted his eyebrows in surprise, "You're mad at me for that? You're the one who said that you didn't care about who I flirted with. You're not my girlfriend, remember?"

"Screw you." She hissed.

"Screw me?" He asked incredulously, "You're the one that's sending mixed signals."

Maya lifted her head and rose from her spot on the bed so she could look at him up close, "Me?! You're the one that comes to New York and starts flirting with me and calling me gorgeous which is something you stopped doing and I don't know why. You take me to art museums to impress me and then say that we're friends. You keep coming to my window even though I know you have keys to the apartment. Who's playing who?"

"Maya—"

"That's what I thought. Stop messing with my head and just tell me to my face that you don't see me that wa—" He cut her off mid sentence as his hands cupped her face and pulled her to his waiting lips.


	15. only with this girl i really like

_She practically melted into his kiss. The warmth of his mouth sent a current running through her body and he pressed himself closer to her. His hands wandered from her face to her waist and Maya was shaking. Her hand touched his arm as she tried to pull away to catch her breath and when she tried moving back she fell on her bed with Josh following suit. _

_Maya burst into laughter the moment Josh pulled away with a confused look on his face. Soon his confused look turned into a dopey grin and he pecked her cheek, "What are you laughing about, gorgeous?" _

_It was truly pathetic how much she had missed him calling her that, "Why did you kiss me?"_

_He rolled off her and laid on his side while she turned her head to look at him, "Because I've been meaning to for a long time."_

_A grin spread across her face (it was hard not to when he said stuff like that) and she leaned in to kiss him. Before she could pull away, he leaned forward to relish in the feel on her lips and it made the grin return with the same gusto. _

_"So, you do like me."_

_Josh pretended to think about it, "Sometimes."_

_Maya hit his arm softly, "Liar. You started calling me gorgeous again."_

_"Because you are."_

_"And you kissed me." Another kiss followed that sentence. _

_"It's hard not to." Josh grabbed her hand and intertwined their fingers and grinned the boyish way that she thought made him look adorable._

_"You really are a flirt." She whispered._

_"Only with this girl I _really_ like." He whispered back._

_She scoot closer to him and cuddled into his chest, "That's me." said Maya softly._

_"Yeah," Josh planted a kiss to the top of her head, "It is."_

_"Will I see you tomorrow? And I don't mean when you're climbing through my window."_

_"Absolutely, gorgeous."_

Maya felt extremely giddy that morning even though Josh wasn't beside her anymore.

Everything from last night happened. Josh had kissed her. _She_ was the one that Josh liked. _She_ was the one that made him happy. It was like some sort of fantasy and she held out hope that Josh wouldn't oversleep today and greet her at the table (and maybe kiss her again?).

Maya had stayed up so long with Josh that she had woken up late too. Even though she rushed to get ready, her quick legs came to a halt when she stepped out of her room.

The happy feeling slipped away as Shawn paced back and forth on the phone. His eyebrows were furrowed and there was a deep frown on his face.

"What's wrong?" Maya asked quietly. Shawn just shook his head and shooed her away.

Maybe it was a bill collector. Maybe it was stuff about his job. But the moment Maya shut her apartment door to go meet Farkle, she didn't believe it was any of those.

* * *

"You will not believe what I'm about to tell you!" Farkle called to her the minute she stepped outside. She made her way to the car confused as her best friend beamed at her.

"Does it involve Isadora?" She opened the car door before sitting down. Farkle pulled out of his parking spot near the sidewalk.

He nodded, "It does actually."

"Judging from the look on your face, it went pretty well."

"I _did _kiss her so I guess that qualifies as pretty well." He said casually and Maya gaped.

"No way! You _kissed_ Isadora?!" That was faster than she thought.

"Don't act like it's such a big deal, I had sex with her last weekend if you didn't remember."

Maya scoffed, "Wow, I didn't know kissing was so casual to you. To some of us, it's somewhat of a big deal."

"Sorry that my love life is more interesting than yours, Hart. When some people are attracted to each other, they act on it. Unlike you and Josh." Farkle was speaking like he was the teacher and she was the student. Maya smiled to herself thinking back on the previous night with Josh.

"Yeah, I guess I have a few things to learn from you, oh wise one."

"A lot of people do, don't worry."

* * *

Maya's day revolved around feeling happy for Farkle and worrying about who Shawn was talking to on the phone. He looked upset and whoever was on the phone was screaming. She also thought about Josh and what he was going to say or do today. Would they go on another adventure around the city?

Though Maya's thoughts were whisked away when she saw Riley's desk empty. Again.

So, Riley officially would rather skip school than look at Maya. There were no choices that would've kept Riley by her side but it still hurt. Even though the feeling from freshman year faded, Maya felt like this one wouldn't. This wasn't just over a stupid party and Missy. It was about Josh and their family and stuff that Maya shouldn't have been a part of but was.

And everything was ruined and it was all her fault.

The class dragged on as if they wanted Maya to relish in the feeling of Riley being gone. They only had a two or three questions to answer but it felt like that they would remain that way.

When the bell finally rang, it was like a saving grace. Everyone got up and headed for the door including a perky Missy. Maya was ready to leave too so that she could get Riley out of her head and see Josh.

But a weight fell beside her in Riley's seat and that weight belonged to Lucas Friar.

"You doing okay?" He asked her with genuine curiosity.

"No." She said instantly and almost regret it because the last thing she needed right now was pity.

"She'll get over it, you know? You and Riley weren't to be apart from each other."

Maya could see one thing that Lucas and Riley had in common and it was their optimism, "Don't tell me you actually believe that, Ranger Rick."

He smiled at his old nickname, "I really do. I believe this because I know another girl who is just as miserable as you are right now because of the fight."

"Really?"

"Really. She'll come around." He pat her shoulder before grabbing his bag and passing an annoyed looking Missy on the way out.

* * *

Maya believed Farkle when he said that he kissed Isadora. But people kissed a lot and that might not always mean they're in a relationship. For example, Isadora and Farkle completely denied being an item when Maya asked after school.

Farkle never gave anyone but Maya rides home but it seemed that sitting in the passenger side looking shy but happy was Isadora Smackle.

A smirk played on her lips as she looked at the two, "You didn't tell me that you're girlfriend was coming." Then Isadora looked up looking flustered just as Farkle turned his attention from the radio.

"She's not my girlfriend."

"I'm not his girlfriend."

The only thing to contradict their statement was the fact that they were holding hands. Maya made herself comfortable in the back seat before asking, "Oh really? Then you're just friends?"

"Yes." They answered in unison.

"Friends who hold hands?" Farkle turned to glare at her as Isadora's cheeks burned bright red.

"Shut up." Farkle muttered under his breath.

[*]

Maya left the two not lovers to their awkward and adorable silence when she stepped out of the car to go inside her apartment building.

Her worries from the morning weren't as prominent until she walked in to see Shawn pacing around the apartment running his hands through his hair. Something he did when he was nervous.

"Is there something going on that I should know about?" She asked him and he stopped. She could see that their was clear panic on his face. Now, she was sure something wasn't right.

"It's Josh. He's gone."

"What do you mean he's gone? Where did he go?" He couldn't be gone, he promised her that he would be here for her. To see her. To talk to her.

"If I knew then I wouldn't be panicking, would I?" He said frustrated.

Maya rolled her eyes, "Do you know why he left?"

"Cory called me this morning demanding that I drop Josh off at their house. I didn't bother lying more and saying that Josh wasn't with us because it seemed like Cory already knew the truth and wouldn't be convinced otherwise. I told Josh that I was taking him home and he told me to give him a second to get dressed. I go to the bathroom and the next minute he's gone. The window was open and everything. He even managed to take the keys to your mom's car. Now, I have no idea where he went."

"And you didn't drive around and try to look for mom's car?" She said angrily.

"Of course I did, Maya but if Josh doesn't want to be found, he won't. He's been hidden from his family for nearly three weeks, remember that."

Just when she thought Josh couldn't be that much of a mystery, just when she thinks that the riddle that was Joshua Matthews was solved, he disappears without a trace.

[*]

She couldn't sleep.

How could she?

Josh was gone and there would be no knocking on her window or night time chats. He wouldn't be able to kiss her again because she was pretty sure he wouldn't come back.

The question popped into her head: what was Josh running away from?

Why did it seem like such a mission to get him back home?

What could possibly be so bad about being with his family now?

There were no rational answers in Maya's head. She never knew anyone that would suddenly want to run away from their family. Especially a loving family like the Matthews.

_Thump. Thump. Thump._

Immediately, Maya sat up to open the window. Outside, on his knees was Josh with his breathless smile and windblown hair. Seeing him in front of her almost made her curiosity and anger about the whole situation disappear.

"Where have you been?! We were all worried." She said to him as he climbed through the window. Instead of responding like a normal person, he pulled her in for a kiss that shouldn't have left her mind fuzzy.

He rested his forehead on hers, "I just wanted to see if I was still allowed to do that."

Maya breathed a smile before stepping away from him, "Where were you and why did you ran away?"

Josh groaned softly at the loss of contact but answered her question nonetheless, "I was at Farkle's. He didn't lie to you either, I hid in his bathroom until I thought it was safe to come back for my stuff."

"Come back for your stuff? You mean you're not staying?" Maya inquired softly as she tried to mask her disappointment.

"I can't stay, gorgeous. My brother knows where I am and I can't go back with him. I just...can't." He lowered his head when his voice started to shake and Maya stepped forward to grab his hand.

"Why can't you go back?"

Josh shook his head.

"Josh, you've kept the secret long enough, I'm the only one who doesn't know why you ran away. I thought we were closer than that."

He squeezed her hand and pulled her close to him, "We are close, Maya. I just..."

"What?"

He remained silent for a few moments before he closed his eyes and whispered, "I ran away because my dad...doesn't remember me."


	16. and where will i be sleeping, ms hart?

"Your dad doesn't remember you?" Maya asked tentatively.

"He has Alzheimer's. He's had it for a while actually, this was just the only time that I realized that I was losing my dad." His eyes were still closed and she swore that a tear was sliding down his cheek.

"Josh, I'm so sor—"

"Don't Maya, please. I can take all the pity stuff from my family and my friends but not from you."

Why did her opinion matter so much? The question was on the tip of her tongue but she refused to voice it. Instead she wrapped her arms around his neck and held him close.

"Is this okay?"

"Yeah." He breathed.

They were silent for a second and Maya was ready to let the whole thing go except her mind was curious. But she didn't want to scare Josh away with her prying.

"So, that's why you ran away."

"Yeah, I don't really like thinking about it but then again it's all I think about when I'm not thinking of you. You deserve the truth, Maya and not just some part of it. You deserve all of it."

Contrary to what she might've thought, the crestfallen look on Josh's face was more than enough to convince her that him telling her the story of his dad losing his memory was not a good idea.

"Josh, you don't have to tell me anything—"

He pulled away and looked at her, "Yes I do, Maya. I have to tell you because you're one of the most important people in my life and you've blindly trusted me and I can't even tell you how grateful I am for that. You deserve better than me anyway, gorgeous."

It felt strange having him so vulnerable in front of her. The confident and suave boy she had grown very fond of melted away to nothing but a boy who seemed frightened and confused.

And she did the only thing that she could think of and kissed him. It was quick and she did it because he needed reassurance and she needed him to know that she didn't want "better".

She wanted him.

Josh looked at her briefly before stepping away and running a hand through his hair, "So, my dad has been sick for a few months now. Thinking about it from the beginning always messes me up because we didn't think much of his memory loss. We just wrote it off as old age. He would forget dentist appointments and check ups. Then it came to family like he would forget baby showers and the dates of when I was supposed to come visit and I would be stuck at the train station until my mom reminded him. There was one day that we all went out to dinner and there was drinking and my dad loved it. He drank a lot and then went to the bathroom, after that though he had a heart attack in the bathroom."

"I remember the atmosphere changing as they carried my dad away and I was so worried about him. Heart attacks at his age could be fatal but luckily it wasn't for him. The doctor examined his head because it had hit the sink and found that parts of his brain were messed up and that's the reason for him forgetting stuff. Instead of just telling us that it was because of his age, the doctor told us that he was in the first stages of Alzheimer's. He seemed fine when he woke up he was even fine with us taking him to a home and after some time, he forgot about us; my mom, Cory, Eric, Morgan and I, and it was like the man in the bed wasn't my dad but the shell of what my dad was. The man who took me fishing, took me to my first baseball game, all that was gone."

"We all continued to visit him, I was the most reluctant one though. It made me sick to have to introduce myself over and over again and one day I flipped. I yelled at him while he was wired up to monitors because I just couldn't believe that he forgot me. I wanted him to remember, I didn't want to keep introducing myself and pretending like I never knew him. My mom told me it was okay but I knew it wasn't. So I ran," His eyes that had been focused on Maya's lavender walls had began to water and he shut his eyes as the tears fell.

The image broke her heart.

"I stayed with some not so great people doing not so great things and I hated it. I don't remember much of that time but I know that if I did then I'd feel even shittier. You probably already can guess that I kind of do things without thinking like throwing that stupid party and getting drunk and coming into your room. I told my mom that I went back to college because I needed space and she was okay with it but I didn't go back. I still haven't. Shawn called the same day at a time where I knew that if I continued on the path I was going I was going to lose myself and that's when I asked to stay with him. And he said yes. I've been sneaking out in the middle of the night because I felt guilty for abandoning my dad like that. So, I buy little things like a baseball or cards, I even got him a hat, I get him stuff I know he likes. The nurse told me his condition isn't getting any better so I thought the stuff might help."

The story seemed finished but Maya didn't want it to be over. She still wondered how she tied into everything. Was she still just an accomplice to Josh running away?

"You wanna know where you come in?" He inquired and Maya flushed at the fact that she voiced her thoughts.

"Uh, you don't need to–"

He grabbed her hand and kissed the back of it, "Maya Hart, I remember thinking how completely unfair my life was. I remember thinking that New York City couldn't possibly make me feel any better but I was wrong. I remember seeing you and thinking of how aggressive and self assured you were. You, with your blonde hair and bright blue eyes that look at me as if I've done nothing wrong. You make me want to be a better person because you deserve the best. You, Maya Hart are probably the only happy thing in my life right now and when I saw how funny, amazing and more beautiful you had become, I guess I just couldn't help myself."

Her heart was racing. The last person on Earth, she thought would utter sweet words to her was Josh. Him, with his broken life and innocent heart. She leaned forward and kissed him softly because once again she was at a loss for words.

The only good thing about her kissing him was that it made him smile. Even if the smile was small. He pecked her lips before whispering, "I needed to tell you that before I left. You needed to know how I felt."

Her eyes shot open, "You're still leaving? Y-You can't, not after everything you just said."

"What do you want me to do, gorgeous? Wait until morning for Cory to come here looking? I'm not going back there."

Maya squeezed his hand, "Don't you want to see your dad? Don't you think you should finally face him?"

"I can't. My mom probably won't even let me back to see him. I've been missing classes at NYU and my mom knows and is probably even more pissed at me. The day I didn't go out to see my dad, that's when my buddy, Tom called me saying that my mom visited campus to see me. You're friends can only cover for you for so long. I'm not going to ask you to cover for me anymore, you lost Riley because of it."

"Josh," Maya began, "I'm not going to let you go through this alone. No matter what you say, I don't care. You mean so much to me and now that I know all the crap you've been through, I just want to make sure you're okay. You have to see your dad."

"I just told you my mom is probably pissed. I won't be able to see him with her around. And she's there until visiting hours are over."

"Then we'll go when visiting hours are over."

Josh raised his eyebrows, "We?"

"Yeah, you're gonna need help sneaking into a nursing home." She said like it was obvious that he wasn't going alone.

"Alright, I'm guessing that you're going to make me stay the night here too." He let go of her hands so that his could rest on her hips. Josh was smirking and it made her giddy to see him flirtatious again.

"If by here you mean in my room then yes. If I leave you alone you might run away." Her fingers were grabbing his shirt and pulling him as close as possible.

"And where will I be sleeping, Ms. Hart?" asked Josh innocently.

"Next to me of course, but I expect you to keep your hands to yourself, Mr. Matthews."


	17. you're under arrest for trespassing

You would think that sneaking into a nursing home wouldn't faze Maya but it did.

Just sitting outside in her mom's car and looking at the place made her cringe. How could Gammy ever want to stay in a place like that, Maya wondered.

"That's weird." Josh voiced.

"What is?"

"It's only eight and my mom's car isn't in the parking lot. I know because she always parks in the same place, near the front because she gets here so early." His gaze was fixed on the white double doors at the front of the building and Maya couldn't help but wonder what he was thinking. Was he nervous about seeing his dad? Did he still want to go through with all of this?

"So, we'll wait a little longer before heading inside. You're okay?" She asked softly and he turned to look at her with a smile.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Are you okay?" Was it that noticeable? This was the place that caused Josh to run away and break down. This was the place that held what was left of Mr. Matthews. It was overwhelming to say the least.

"Yep. I'm great."

[*]

Eventually, Maya grew impatient and decided that the sooner they waited, the tighter Josh's grip would be on her hand.

The two headed inside with shaky hands and racing minds. There were old people being wheeled along the oak flooring and a long open desk that Maya assumed was supposed to be filled with people but was empty.

Josh looked around after a few wheeled people were rolled passed them. The building was quiet and eerie and it made Maya miss the noisy and busy city. Her legs followed Josh's direction as he made his way down the right side of the corridor.

The lights were bright and inviting which seemed strange in a place like this. A place where you deliver your relatives and see them slowly decay. If she thought outside was bad, the inside was much worse.

Josh had her on an adventure through the nursing home but stopped immediately when his name was called.

"Joshua?" A woman who had just stepped out of a room called. Her thin brown hair was tied in a high ponytail and the her navy blue scrubs looked a little big on her. Her friendly voice and innocent brown eyes made Maya relax.

"Nancy? I-I didn't know you were gonna be here." He answered nervously. Their connected hands allowed her to feel his hand get clammy.

"I could say the same thing. You seemed just fine popping in and out of here with gifts for your dad. I hope this pretty blond isn't another one." Nancy finally directed her attention to Maya as did Josh and she blushed.

"Uh, no. This is Maya, she's my..." Cue the awkward glance at each other followed by a look at the ground. Nancy must've realized she crossed into unresolved teen drama and changed the subject.

"So, I'm guessing you came to see your dad?"

"Yeah, I thought it was finally time."

"Well, your dad's condition is prohibiting him from seeing anyone. You and Maya are going to leave." She said in a calm voice but it struck something in Josh.

"What do you mean? He's all alone in there. I'll only be a minute." Josh asked desperately but Nancy didn't look like she would cave.

"No, Josh. His condition isn't great which is something I've told you numerous times. Your presence might wake him up and make it worse." Her voice never raised and she wasn't actually lecturing them but Maya felt herself get annoyed with the nurse who was previously her temporary safety blanket in this place.

"I'll see him quick. It's not like I'm gonna touch him."

"Josh, I said no and if I have to ask one more time, I'll have you thrown out."

"But he really needs to speak to him." Maya begged but it continued to do nothing.

"I'm sorry but you really have to go."

Defeated and angry, Josh turned them around and they headed towards the exit with Nancy behind them. Maya was frustrated.

Josh needed to see his dad, it wasn't an option. And Nancy really needed to back off.

They needed a plan and Maya thought she might just have one.

[*]

Maya waited patiently for the phone inside to ring. If Farkle and Isadora were as good an actor as she hoped, they would be in and out without a hitch. He came to the nursing home while Isadora called because he thought if they both distracted her, it would be more efficient. So, that's how her and Josh ended up waiting outside while Isadora and Farkle did their little performance.

Apparently, Farkle's "grandpa" needed clam chowder but he got plain while Isadora was mumbling stuff in a different language. Nancy was the only nurse at the front so she had to deal with both of them at the same time. When they saw Nancy disappear with Farkle to go towards the kitchen, they were off. Josh thought that if they ran, it would bring more attention to themselves so they speed walked while Maya continuously glanced over her shoulder to see if Nancy was coming.

They were clear and only stopped when they reached Mr. Matthews' room door. Josh took a shaky breath and Maya could see his struggle to open the door. He opened it and he let go of her hand. Mr. Matthews was laying down with his eyes closed and his grey hair was ruffled. He looked incredibly thinner than how Maya remembered him three years ago and it was unsettling.

Josh seemed to be in a trance as he made his way to the chair beside his father and sighed, "So," He whispered, "Here I am. Finally. I hope you liked all the stuff I got because I tried really hard to think of things you would like. I'm kind of beating around the bush here because I've been struggling with seeing you for three weeks and I can't stand how everyone sees me and how I see myself. I'm tired of being a coward and avoiding you because I know that that's not what you would've wanted. You would've wanted me to be strong but I don't think I can anymore." His shoulders began to shake and his head lowered and Maya was next to him in a matter of seconds. He was sobbing with his head down and her heart ached for him.

He didn't deserve to go through this. The happy and suave Josh she once knew wasn't really Josh at all. It was a facade and a mask to disguise all the things he was bottling in. It was Josh's way of hiding this and watching him unravel was agonizing.

"Dad, I'm so sorry for leaving you. I'm sorry if you ever felt alone and I'm sorry that I wasn't strong enough to..." He placed his hand on top of his father's injected one and continued to cry.

Maya hugged him from the side while he was sitting so the position was awkward and when she pulled away she nearly jumped out of her skin. A police siren sounded off outside and Josh's head shot up.

"We have to go, Josh. Farkle didn't do a good job."

"No," He shook his head, "I can't leave him."

"If we stay, we're going to get arrested. We can always come back tomorrow, Josh. But we have to go-" She tugged lightly on his arm and he stilled. His father laid there, he appeared lifeless and his heart monitor was the only thing proving her theory wrong. Josh went along with Maya until they were at the door. The moment they stepped out there were people grabbing at them.

"You're under arrest for trespassing." One of them said to Maya.

"What? Let go of me!" Maya shouted as the officer's grip on her wrist was borderline bruising. Josh managed to free himself from the other lanky officer that came and punched the officer that was holding Maya in the face.

"Get your hands off my girlfriend!" More officers arrived and it was like a whirlwind, she saw Josh being held by two men and Farkle's sophisticated begging from the side. There were definitely handcuffs on her now and she could hear the buzzing of the officer reciting her rights to her.

But that wasn't her main focus of the night. No, it had to be the distinct fast paced beeping of a heart monitor and the nurses flocking towards Mr. Matthews' room.

* * *

The three of them waited inside a cell while the police got a hold of their information and the atmosphere seemed dark.

Josh's head was looking down and his bangs had fallen into his eyes. He seemed so upset that Maya couldn't think of anything to say to make him feel better. He hardly moved and the only way Maya could tell that he wasn't asleep was that on occasion he would carefully sweep his thumb over the back of her hand that was under his large one. Farkle's emotions were more easy to depict though.

He was looking around the holding cell like there were prisoners inside with them. But it was only them three and the uncomfortable wooden bench.

Maya didn't know what to think, the whole night had gone to complete crap. Her idea of giving Josh closure probably made everything worse and she didn't know if he even wanted to speak to her. Even though he did punch an officer for her.

And called her his girlfriend.

Before her thoughts could wander to the only highlights of the night, a tall, thin Hispanic officer approached them and said, "You're free to go." Her thoughts of being Josh's faded into anxiety the moment she realized to whom they were free to go to.

As the officer stepped away from the cell bars, three other people took his place.

Mrs. Matthews, Cory and Riley.


	18. everything was gone

Josh didn't look up until Cory cleared his throat. It was then that life returned to him and he looked terrified. He remained in his sitting position on the bench until Mrs. Matthews opened the door and signaled for all of them to step out.

Maya preferred to say in there with Josh. She really didn't want to have another fight with Riley and seeing her after everything that happened hurt. Josh's problem distracted her from her own and she didn't mind that. But Farkle too initiative for her and grabbed her hand so the two could walk out of the holding cell.

He was the only non-Matthews that looked pissed. He wasn't a fan of Riley, he didn't appreciate what Riley did and based off Maya and Riley's reaction to seeing one another, he knew that he must've missed another argument between the two.

Riley followed after them while Cory stepped inside the cell to reach Josh. What were they going to do? Yell at him? He's gone through enough of his own criticism and lecturing. He's bullied himself into thinking he was a horrible person and he didn't need anyone else saying that to him.

Josh was fragile and Maya didn't know anything about the state he was in now. From his cold, solemn face to the petrified expression he wore when he saw his mother, brother and niece. When she didn't know something, it made her wonder and the more she wondered about Josh, the more worried she got. Was he going to do something stupid or run away and do something stupid?

"Maya, wait! Farkle-"

He spun around so quickly, she thought he was going to get whiplash, "Save it, your highness. If you're here to yell at Maya some more, save it."

"I'm not here to yell. I'm here to apologize, if you'll let me." If there was one thing that Riley wasn't, was a liar. She looked sorry, her big brown eyes couldn't hide that and Maya brought her hand out of Farkle's grasp and returned them to her side.

"Why?" said Farkle before Maya could.

"Because, I've spent the last two days feeling like crap and thinking about everything that's happened the past three weeks. After three years, we were friends again. It felt like no time has passed at all and that my life was...normal. Everything just kind of fell back into place after we became friends, I spent so much time talking to you that I had no time for Missy's crap. You gave me the courage to tell Lucas how I felt and now I have a potential boyfriend. You even brought my uncle back to us, even if it was in handcuffs but that's not my point. I want to be your friend because everything makes sense when you're my friend. Nothing is wrong and everything is great because I have you by my side and I know I've been a really horrible friend and really close minded but if you give me another chance, I swear that I won't screw it up ever again."

The Matthews had a thing for making her speechless with their lengthy, emotional monologues. First Josh and now Riley. She could feel Farkle's eyes burning holes in her temples but she didn't care. All she could hear was Riley apologizing for everything, Riley acknowledging that those three years were hell and that she needs her. All she could hear was Riley mirroring the thoughts she's had the last three years without her.

And before she could even think about it, she took two long steps forward and ran into her tall friend, throwing her arms around her and pulling her close.

"I'm sorry too." Maya whispered into her hair. The cold tears that fell through her open knit cardigan only validated how much the two girls meant to one another and that sort of made Maya want to cry too. Her best friend was back in her life.

For good.

Maya was about to pull away when she felt someone's body hit her back and their arms wrap around the two so that she was sandwiched in between two people. The third party happened to be Farkle who was shaking and Maya assumed that the speech had hit him too.

"I'm sorry about everything that happened with you too, Farkle." Riley managed to voice between hiccups. He simply nodded against the top of Maya's head and the three hugged it out like the three weirdos they were and will always be.

* * *

Maya made it home late after going absolutely everywhere with Riley and Farkle.

The three had agreed that they needed to bond like they used to and even managed to bring Ranger Rick along for the ride. The core four was back together and it appeared that they were closer than ever now. And when you're rekindling three years of friendship, it'll take time.

About six hours, more or less.

Probably more if you have your friends disagree on what movie to watch and then decide on watching all three movies that same day.

Probably more if you have friends that _just_ need to go to your usual hang out as a group again because they haven't been there in _forever_ because it just wasn't the same with other people.

Everyone is asleep when she gets home so there aren't any lectures on getting home late. Maya goes in her messy room and removes her shoes and clothes to change into her baggy pajama shirt and her really comfy shorts. Only when she's on her bed does she think about Josh.

Would he be climbing into her window tonight?

Probably not because of everything that happened at the hospital and his family was probably going to be watching him like a hawk.

But did that mean that he wasn't going to come back?

The never ending questions had popped into her head and the longer they remained unanswered, the more frustrated she became so she the only solution was to go into his room and check if he's there or not.

His bedroom door was cracked open a bit so Maya didn't think of knocking. What waited inside made her stomach plummet. The bed was made and the dressers were empty while the floor remained clear. It didn't look like anyone stepped foot in this room for a while, let alone slept in it. But the thing that worried her was the lack of any evidence of Josh.

His suitcases were gone, even thought he only left two backpacks full of stuff here before Maya hatched her _brilliant_ invasion of the hospital and just for good measure, Maya checked the closets which were hollow too.

Everything was gone.


	19. gloomy skies that were threatening rain

There was a funny thing about life.

It liked to trick you into believing that everything could work out in the end. Maybe that was just the hope that movies about family, friends and love makes it seem like even if things don't go the way you want them to, it'll work out in the end. People who created those movies were expert brainwashers because that never happens.

Directors in movies also let you believe that in life, the bad people always receive punishment while the good people are rewarded.

But standing there in her black skater dress under the gloomy skies that were threatening rain, Maya Hart could wholeheartedly disagree.

_ **Alan Matthews** _

_ **Beloved husband & father** _

_ **December 14, 1954-May 5, 2015** _

Good people like the Matthews family didn't deserve this. Amy Matthews stood shaking with her head buried into Eric's shoulder who had his eyes shut while Morgan made her devastating speech about being her dad's little girl forever. Cory stood next to his wife and behind his mother, with his daughter and son's sobbing figures to his left.

Maya couldn't see Riley's face from her spot by Shawn and her mother and thinking about it much later, she was glad that she didn't.

She was empathetic to her core and being in the middle of such a morbid and cryptic event, made her inside tangle and clench. Her blue eyes never stopped moving though. She needed new things to take her mind off the coffin that hung above it's six feet deep hole. Her mind needed to be off the fact that Mr. Matthews was in there and was soon going to be lowered and soon he would decay into nothing.

But the more she looked, the more she realized that one fatal person was missing.

It was Josh.

Somehow that made her feel worse than the thought of him being here, mourning with his family. The guy didn't even want to show up to his father's funeral because he was probably so overwhelmed with grief.

That...or guilt.

Though Shawn assured her of Josh's innocence to everything, Maya wasn't sure if Josh was assured of his innocence. He couldn't believe that it was his fault. If anything it was her fault for thinking up the whole thing. Heart attacks were never anyone's fault.

Her worry continued through the whole day as her memories of Josh telling her the truth came to light.

_"You probably already can guess that I kind of do things without thinking..."_

What would he do this time? His father was dead, the one person that caused him to run away to New York and go through all this craziness the past three weeks were because of his dad. He probably thought he had nothing to lose now that his father was gone. And Maya wasn't afraid to admit that that mentality scared the crap out of her.

Josh had everything to lose if he self-destructed now. He still needed to go back to university and get everything sorted out. He needed to see his family and comfort them.

Josh couldn't run away either. If his past actions have taught her anything, it was that Josh was good at keeping away from people he loves. He could be gone for as long as he deemed fit and from Josh's past words, that would take a while.

She needed to see him. She needed to let him know that none of it was his fault and that he didn't need to disappear.

Maya opened her eyes and decided that thinking in her bed wouldn't be the right thing to do. There was leftover Chinese food in the fridge from yesterday, Shawn thought that buying her food would make breaking the news easier. She remembers not being hungry then and she wasn't hungry now but needed a distraction. It wasn't her job to worry about Josh, the more she had him in her thoughts, the more panicked she would feel.

The moment she reached her door, a familiar thumping on her window stopped her cold. It wasn't as frantic as it had been the last time, it was softer and weaker and when Maya turned around she could see why.

His face was hidden by his ebony bangs and he had been tapping the top of his head gently on the window as he leaned against it. All other times he's been on her window sill, he was flirty and smiling, just _looking_ at her. She hadn't realized that she was at the window, opening it until she could hear him sobbing quietly.

"Josh." Maya voiced as a question rather than a statement, like the crying hunched over boy couldn't possibly be him. It couldn't possibly be the boy she's gotten to know again over the past three weeks.

He lifted his head at the sound of his name and her heart clenched. His cheeks were wet and blotchy, his eyes were bloodshot and filled with fresh tears while his hair and clothes looked unusually nice to just be wondering around. Someone who is in the middle of mourning didn't just purchase a tux, did that mean that he...?

"So, you were there. You were at the funeral?" He nodded and Maya didn't think he would say anything while he sat out there so she crawled out to the fire escape with him and took his hand.

Once again, Josh surprised her, "I didn't want to be."

"How could you say that? It was for your dad, he would've wanted you to be there."

"He also would've wanted to be alive. You know the reason for his death, don't you?" His voice was cracking and hoarse but angry. Nothing in his tone revealed how broken he looked.

"Josh, stop."

He shook his head furiously, "No, he died because of me. His heart attack was caused by all the commotion outside of his room. If I never would've went, if I would've just stayed away like I planned..."

"He would've...passed away another day, at another time anyway just like the rest of us are going to eventually. Don't blame yourself for things you can't change."

His angry shell cracked as he looked away from her and let out a shaky breath, "This wasn't how I wanted him to go though. Not that I would want him to at all but, he died scared and alone and I did that. He could've died asleep and peaceful. He could've drifted away to the sound of my mom's voice and the warmth of her hands but I changed all of that. You can't blame me for feeling like complete shit about it."

Maya stood up on her knees and hugged Josh close to her chest and he continued to cry, "I wouldn't blame you for anything, Josh." The amount of time they stayed out there, Maya couldn't remember; the only thing she could remember was Josh's hiccuped breathing breaking the silence of the night before she woke up alone in her bed the next morning.


	20. her joshua matthews

People always said that when you graduate from high school, you'll miss it almost immediately. Maya didn't think there was anything in this school that she would possibly miss. The lunch tasted like cardboard, the majority of the kids in her grade were shallow and annoying and the teachers were _way_ too nagging. People might think her thoughts on the school are negative and pessimistic but that wasn't true.

There were (very few) good moments, like when her and Farkle went to prom in clown suits. Or when they both had a milk drinking contest and got sick and needed to be sent home. But the most memorable moments would definitely be from this year, when she got her best friend back.

The two got a B on their questions paper and Maya remembered thinking that was the first B she had gotten in that class all year. Maybe it was because Riley rewrote the paper and used fancy grammar.

So no, she was negative. She was actually somewhat happy that day. Everyone was being called up to get their diploma and get the chance to shake the principal's wrinkly hand.

Oh how exciting.

Alright, she was being negative but who could blame her? You would think the ceremony would be over now but no. There was about four hundred kids in her class and Maya was slowly losing her patience with every single one. How hard was it to walk a little faster when your name was being called? How hard was it to just follow the lead of the person in front of you?

Riley called her snappy when Maya shared her thoughts later that day. Apparently, everyone else was getting emotional and that's why they were going slow. Maya just wanted to get out of there, the sun was beaming down on her and she could feel her gown start to stick to her legs.

When the moment did come, Maya could feel herself smile.

It's been a while since she actually smiled and it would have nothing to do with a certain boy from Philly that gave her the craziest three weeks of her life. Nope, it had nothing to do with him practically ignoring her for two months. She was fine.

Shawn said that he needed time and Maya was more than willing to give it to him and she felt completely selfish thinking otherwise. She felt like so clingy when she wondered why he hasn't called her. He had a phone. He had her number.

It was a simple process.

But it was selfish and foolish for her to think that he would call. The person that mattered to him most passed away and he thought it was his fault. Anyone could know that he needed time.

Maybe it was all the times he snuck into her room in the middle of the night or when she told him about Riley and he was completely okay with it or when he opened up to her about his dad. Maybe that was why she wanted him to call. In her head, the two were close.

Not just romantically but Josh proved to be a close confident about Riley whenever she was scared that Farkle would flip out on her. He was nice to talk to and she thought the least he could do was call her and tell her he's okay.

Or as okay someone could be in mourning.

No, no, no, Maya mentally shook her head.

She did not need to think about all that. She had her friends altogether again and that was great. It was strange, having them together as a group again made her wonder how she never missed it.

Even though, Farkle was loud and eccentric enough for Lucas and Riley.

"So, you're not gonna miss any of this?" People from their class rushed over to their friends and family, some were crying, others were screaming, "Freedom!" and snapping as many selfies as possible.

"Absolutely not. The only things I'd miss about high school are gonna stay in my life forever." Yes, her friends were making her sappy.

"Are you actually admitting that you missed us, Maya?" Lucas appeared beside the two girls and slung his arm around Riley. The two were so cute together she might just puke.

"Maybe just Farkle and Riley. You're kind of iffy, Sundance."

Farkle was next to Maya now too and it was strange seeing everyone so happy over an hour ceremony about a piece of paper inside leather casing.

"Some things just don't ever change." He said and pecked Riley's cheek.

Farkle linked arms with Maya who then linked arms with Riley who followed suit and linked arms with Lucas, "If the four of us stay together, nothing ever will." said Farkle who looked a little teary-eyed.

Isadora waved him over from where she was with her parents and their moment was over. For now.

"So, as a graduation gift I thought that I could bring you something that I know you've wanted for a while." Her mouth twitched, struggling to hold back her smile before she took off her cap and gave Maya a letter.

It was folded in three and had a few dark scribbles that caught Maya's attention before she saw the top of it.

_Dear Maya,_

_Yes, I chose to write a letter to you. But that is only because I thought calling would be too weird and texting was too insincere. I'm sorry for everything I've put you through those three weeks and I hope you'll forgive me for disappearing the night of the funeral. It still hurts with him being gone and all but I'm trying to work through with my family, I haven't had a drink in two months. I miss you more than you know, Hart and don't worry, you'll see me sooner than you think. You're absolutely incredible, Maya._

_Love, Josh_

And what he said was true because that night when she was beginning to fall asleep, she heard a noise that she remembers hearing months ago.

_Thump. Thump. Thump. _

Sitting on the fire escape was a beaming Joshua Matthews.

_Her_ Joshua Matthews.


End file.
